


You're The Ocean

by brodylover



Category: Supernatural
Genre: AU, Animal Abuse, Blood, Cuddling, Cutting, F/M, Fluff, Guns, Hand Job, Heterosexual Sex, Hospitals, Hurt/Comfort, Interspecies Romance, Interspecies Sex, M/M, Major Character Injury, Major character death - Freeform, Mating, Nightmares, One Night Stands, Oral Sex, Scars, Size Difference, Stitches, Tentacle Sex, Veterinary Medicine, animal cas, car crash, raphael's a dick, wound
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-07-23
Updated: 2013-10-13
Packaged: 2017-12-21 03:32:33
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 39
Words: 32,332
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/895279
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/brodylover/pseuds/brodylover
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean, trying to get the perfect graduation gift for Sam, end up getting a pet for himself instead, a small mermaid that fits in his hand that's close to death. It would be a miracle if he can get the little guy healthy again, but it would be even harder to figure out what he is, or why people want him so badly.<br/>Gets porny later on<br/>This fic is now on tumblr as a sort of askblog and there is art there! youre-the-ocean.tumblr.com</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. To Meet You

Pet stores. Dean hated them. Cats and dogs, eh, they got to him. It was allergies and noise and fur and he just didn’t like it. Sam was graduating from Stanford though and he wanted to get him something nice, something he’d always wanted. 

He couldnt get Sam a dog though. There was no way he was letting a dog in his car. He’d never get the smell out of the leather. A fish maybe? A gerbil? Dean didn’t know and he walked around the pet store, sneezing, looking for the right thing. 

The problem was, everything seemed too boring, too safe. Sam would get bored of something cute and cuddly unless it was able to participate in his activities. There must be something of a bit more interest, something that would challenge Sam in some way. 

"Finding any new friends?" the owner asked, slithering up beside him. There was something off about him, the way he was too quiet, the slight slither in his voice. He looked stereotypical asian, but he also looked hispanic, but his eyes were blue and his skin tone light. He was an enigma. The rodents were terrified of him too.

"I don’t know." Dean shrugged, wiping at his nose, “You have anything, you know, less normal?"

"Less normal?" the man asked and yes, there was an accent there, but Dean could not place it anywhere. “Yes, yes, come in the back. We’ll see what we can scrounge up for you."

There were shelves with more cages and boxes, low light, animals who looked like they really needed to see the light of day. There were snakes and spiders and fish and squid. Nothing was really what Dean was looking for, not with the price tags attached, but it was definitely closer. 

Everything was still a bit too safe though, too normal. The pet store owner seemed to notice and his smile widened. His teeth looked sharp.

"Ah, I see. So that’s the sort of man we are. Wait here a moment." he turned and slipped behind a curtain and there was some rummaging. When the man returned he held a simple fish tank that was too heavy for a man his size to carry as easily as he was. 

The water was murky, terribly so, but there were bursts of light inside, like a terrible thunderstorm. Now this was more like it.

"Lightning fish." the man explained, “Easy to care for. Live for a long time. $500 each."

"Each?" Dean balked. He wanted them, sure he did, but $500 was way out of his price range. “I don’t have that kind of, wait…"

The cloudy murkiness of the water was a bit thinner towards the bottom and there was a shape down there. It was shaped somewhat like a man and unlike the other fish, it didn’t light up at all. It also wasn’t moving. 

"What this at the bottom of the tank?" he pointed it out.

The man frowned, “That? That’s nothing. A tank decoration."

The tank really was heavy though and the man’s arms were starting to shake from the strain. The movement made the shape slide closer to the glass and Dean gasped as he saw it. 

It looked like a small boy, a really small boy, easy to fit in his hand. He was pale and thin, ribs deeply pronounced, and his chest heaved terribly, as if it was hard to breathe.

"It’s alive!" Dean looked up at the man.

He looked down at what Dean was looking, “Oh, oh that. That’s nothing. That’s just Lightning Fish food. Sometimes you have to feed them live bait.

The creature didnt look completely human, he had gills and webbed fingers, and four long black tentacles instead of legs. There were two black wing like shapes on his back, too, narrow fins.

"Live bait?" the concept sickened him. The small creature was cute, in a way, and defenseless, there was no way that was fair, “He’s barely alive! Screw it, how much for him?"

The man looked confused. “You want to buy bait? It’s not even going to live much longer."

"I don’t care." Dean was appalled. He had to get that little thing out of the tank, into safety, “How much?"

The man shrugged, “Don’t really know. Never really thought about it."

"How about 50?" Dean was willing to spend more than that, but that seemed like a good start. if this guy was right, the little thing didnt have long to live anyway. At least he could do it in comfort.

"Done." the man said with his eyebrows raised. He wasn’t expecting so much. 

He grabbed a large sandwich bag, filled it half way with the murky water, and scooped the creature up with a small net to put him inside. With the money in hand he gave Dean the baggy and saw him to the door. 

He had failed in getting anything for Sam, there was no way he was giving him something that was just going to die, but he couldnt care right now. 

He kept the baggy in his lap as he drove home, the tiny humanoid still lying deathly still but resting against his leg. 

——

Dean did not have a fish tank. He didn’t know how to take care of this thing. He knew nothing about what he was doing. He did have a pickle jar though. He fished out the pickles and put them in baggies before dumping out the vinegar and scrubbing it as clean as he could. It still smelled vaguely of dill. It was just temporary though and it had to be better than where the little guy had been. 

The little guy. He needed a name. 

He remembered a few things from having goldfish as a kid, but he was 4 then and he didnt remember much. He filled the pickle jar with water before setting the baggy into it, letting the temperature acclimate before he opened the bag. 

The murky water clouded out and there was no way breathing that stuff in could be good for any sea creature. The little guy was still not really moving and when Dean shook him out of the bag, he just sank to the bottom. 

There had been a step he’d missed, but he couldn’t remember what. There was nothing more he could think to do, other than wait and hope that the little guy would do better in the new habitat, so he pulled up a chair and sat beside it, reading a guns and ammo magazine. 

Sam’s present would have to wait.


	2. No More Upside Down

Dean woke up to feeling a little bit wet. He wiped at his face before remembering that he was in his kitchen still, sitting beside the pickle jar. He looked over to it, seeing the little guy still lethargic but moving a bit more now, his breathing not so labored. 

He was up towards the top, grabbing onto the rim with his webbed fingers, and pulling himself up to see Dean better. He looked curious and he had big blue eyes that looked far too sad for something that small. 

"Hello." Dean smiled, “You’re doing a lot better." 

The little guy made a sound, much like a chirp, but he cocked his head and stared at him, as if he was trying to understand what he said. 

"I guess it’s the water huh? It’s not so gross. You can actually breathe." 

The creature did not know what he was saying and Dean felt stupid. His face may have looked human, but he wasn’t. He probably wasn’t even capable of english. 

He splashed the water though and smiled and while the smile was small it warmed Dean up a bit. 

"Yeah. I think you’re going to like it here."

His stomach rumbled and he realized that he had completely forgotten to eat before falling asleep next to the tank. He stood up to go to the fridge and make himself a sandwich and when he turned, those big blue eyes were on him, the creatures tiny little tongue caught between his lips. 

He was emaciated, boney, unhealthy. He had been starved in that last place. Dean headed back to him with his sandwich and sat back down, looking him over. He was staring at the sandwich, one webbed hand outstretched, and he looked pathetic, needy. Dean didn’t know what he ate, but he tore away the smallest piece of bread he could and handed it to the little guy. 

He ate it hungrily, a trilling sound in his throat. That must have been how he communicated. When he was done he reached out again and Dean gave him a slightly larger piece. They ate together like that, the small creature relishing in something as simple as a sandwich until his tiny stomach was bloated. 

He hadn’t eaten anything for a long time and after, he was finally up to normal bouts of activity. Dean kept watching him, kept speaking to him, telling him small little things and asking questions. He was always answered with a cocked head and confused expression. With some of the easier words he saw the small creature mouthing it out, trying to figure out how such a sound would be made. 

"Do you have a name?" Dean asked, reaching out for him. His eyes went wide and he darted under the water, as if afraid of Dean’s touch. It didn’t make much sense since he’d been able to feed him, but touch really wasn’t a good idea. 

He pulled his finger back and the creature rose back to the surface, shaking his head to get water droplets out of his shaggy black hair. It was too long and it kept getting in his eyes. 

"My name’s Dean." Dean said, placing a hand on his chest. “Dean."

The creature was repeating it, silently, forming the shape of the syllables. 

"Do you have a name?" Dean asked again. 

"Eep!" the little guy replied. 

"Well, that’s not much of a name." Dean chuckled, “Well, I’ll come up with something. Don’t you worry."

The little guy looked disappointed in himself and went over the syllables of Dean’s name again. 

"I’m sorry about the tank. It’s all I could think of on short notice." Dean sprawled out on the counter, looking into the boring pickle jar. There wasnt even a plastic scuba diver to entertain his new friend. “I’ll get you a new one today, okay? When I get off work."

He glanced at the clock. It was almost 2. He had a late shift that day, but still, he’d have to head out soon. And he would rather stay here, figure out what this thing was. 

He stretched and straightened out his clothes, packing another meal for later. All the while the creature studied him and repeated the syllables. 

He was almost out the door when he heard a crying.

"Een! Een! Een!" was being shouted out from the tank and he came running, looking back at where the little creature was panicking, eyes big, and he was trying to climb out of his jar. 

"Hey, hey!" Dean reached for him and he fell back into the water. “What are you doing? You need to stay in there."

Even in the water Dean could see that the creature was shaking and curling in on itself in misplaced terror. 

"I’m not leaving you." Dean kept his voice soft, remembering how at the shop the creature had just been discarded and left to die. He must have thought the same thing was happening again. Even though he didn’t know what Dean was saying, he calmed down a bit. 

Dean walked over to the big clock on the wall. He pointed at the 9. “See this? When the line is on it, I’ll be back. Okay?"

The creature looked confused. Glancing from the clock back to him. 

He pointed at the hour hands and dragged it over to the 9 with his finger. That seemed to make more sense, but the creature still didn’t look happy. 

"I’ll come home for you." he promised. Still, he took the plate his sandwich had been on and shook it out over the pickle jar, letting the crumbs float in the water. The little guy could eat those later if he got hungry.

He didn’t make a sound when Dean left now, but he couldn’t help but feel bad. The small creature was going to be more responsibility than he’d ever intended.


	3. Shade of a Shadow

It wasn't a great job and it was only made worse by the fact that Alastair was always singing while he worked. It lasted a lot longer than it was supposed to and it was almost eleven before he was able to leave the lumber yard. 

It was dark and there was no way that any pet store would still be open. The tank would have to wait. 

He drove home as quickly as possible, muscles aching from lifting and moving wood for the past nine hours. He just wanted to rest.

When he got to his small apartment though, he found that going to bed wouldn't be so easy. There was a raspy sound coming from the kitchen, a rough sob. He headed towards it slowly, not knowing what to expect. 

The little guy was at the bottom of the pickle jar, curled in on himself, tentacles and arms hiding his face. 

"Hey." Dean mumbled, voice soft and hesitant. The little guy turned, eyes big and red. "I'm sorry I was late."

"Dean!" he beamed, finally getting the word right. He pushed himself to the top of the tank, pulling himself almost all of the way out, reaching for him. 

"I told you I wasn't leaving you." Dean perched beside him again. "I was just held up."

"Dean."

"Is that all you can say?" 

He bit his lip, not able to think of any response. 

"I'm going to go to bed. Go to sleep." Dean told him. It didn't work, neither did the hand motions for sleeping. "You want to come with me?"

the creature tilted his head to the side.

Dean picked the jar up anyway and he squeaked in surprise. He curled in on himself in his tank though, smiled and stayed close as Dean took him into his room. It was a mess and he kicked dirty clothes out of the way and brushed some things off of the bedside table before setting the jar down on it. 

The creature watched him as he pulled off his shirt, eyes wide. Dean paused, tossing the shirt aside. "What?" he asked. 

The creature just pointed at him and then at himself, dragging a finger down his own torso. He seemed very surprise by the similarities.

"Yeah. We look the same there. That's about it though. Everything else looks really different."

He was about to take off his pants when he realized how awkward it was that the creature was still watching him. 

"Close your eyes." he chuckled but the creature didn't understand. He put his hands over his eyes and that the little guy got. He covered his eyes with two of his tentacles and waited, letting Dean undress with some modesty. 

He climbed into bed before telling the little guy he could look. He swallowed, hard, and did. 

He curled in on himself, tentacles wrapped around one another, and rested his head on them, watching as Dean slowly fell asleep.

===

Fire. There was a terrible fire. It licked at the ceiling and fell all around him. He was running, trying to get to Sam, yelling for his father. But his father was already in the nursery, clutching Sam up in his arms. 

He passed Sam on to Dean, told him to run, get out of there, don't look back. Dean did as he was told. He was always good at following orders. 

But the fire was too hot. It licked at his heels and then there was laughter surrounding him. He kept trying to run, kept trying to get out of the house, but every time he opened the door he was opening the door to the nursery. 

He saw his mother, bleeding out, cut open, hanging from her wrists over the bed. She was burning. 

There was a man, hiding in the shadows that flickered on the walls. Dean couldn't get away from him. 

And he was screaming. 

"Dean!" Came a rough voice and then something wet slapped against his face. He sputtered and woke up, drenched in sweat. The nightmare was vivid and it stayed behind his eyelids for a while, still burning as he panted and gasped. 

He wasn't the only one panting though. There was another gasping sound coming from beside him and he turned over, finding the small creature on his pillow, chest heaving. One tentacle was outstretched, ready to slap Dean again if he had to. 

Dean scooped him up in his hands, feeling his gills open and close rapidly as he tried to breathe. 

He quickly put him back in his tank and watched as the little guy breathed, catching up, soothing his gills with his webbed hands. 

Dean put a hand on the outside of the jar, leaning his head against the coolness of it. "Thank you." his voice sounded wrecked, "I'm sorry, that's probably going to happen a lot."

The creatured swam to the side of the jar, clinging to it with his tentacles and rested his forehead against Dean's. It was calming. It was good. Dean hadn't realized how alone he had felt, how helpful this little guy was for him.

"I took you home to take care of you, not the other way around."

"Dean..."

He stood up. He would go back to bed, sure, but not until the dreams had faded. He pointed to his mouth. 

"Want food?"

The little guy perked up at that, smiling and excited. Yeah, this could work out. It was good to have someone to look out for.


	4. How Sweetly You Bring Light

"Hello Dean." the little guy perked up when he came home, smiling and swimming to the top of his tank. He didn't seem quite so afraid to be left alone on the second day. 

"Hey." Dean smiled back. He pulled open the fridge and grabbed himself a beer, starting to drink before he even collapsed in a chair.

"What?" the creature pointed at the bottle.

"It's a beer." Dean shrugged, "It's relaxing."

The creature cocked his head. 

"Your english is coming along well." Dean praised and the little guy's tentacles curled as the fins on his back stretched. He was proud. 

"Thank you for tv." he smiled. 

Dean had left the tv on when he went to work. He knew that the little guy didn't like being left home alone, probably because he had been left alone with nothing but lightning fish before, and he didn't want him to feel abandoned. He was a good learner too. 

Dean leaned forward, resting his head on his arms. He was filthy, muscles aching, wood chips in his hair. He just wanted to drink beer and rest and figure out what this thing was that he brought home. 

"What are you?" 

The creature shrugged. 

"You don't know?"

"Never met others." he admitted, "Raised in captivity."

"How old are you?"

He thought on that one. "Too hard math."

"What were your old owners like?"

He shrank in on himself, tentacles wrapping around him protectively. "Dark. Lonely. Left a lot. Starvation. Not happy. Change the subject."

He swam down to the bottom of his tank and curled in on himself. The motions were oddly human, him wrapping around himself, hands on his arms as he rocked back and forth, remembering his previous life. 

Dean felt bad. He hadnt intended to remind him of bad things. He was just curious. But now things were making more sense. 

He reached into the pickle jar and ignored how the little guy scurried away and flinched at his touch. He grabbed him gently and pulled him back to the surface of the wate. He felt smooth and strong, muscles sliding underneath the surface of skin. 

"I'm sorry." Dean said, stroking a tentacle with his thumb, "You didn't deserve any of that."

The creature wrapped his arms around Dean's thumb, stilling him. "Not leaving me. Right?"

"No. I'm not going to leave you." Dean promised, and I'm not going to feed you to anyone either. You're safe here."

The creature held his thumb tighter, hugging it. Dean thought he may cry if he was capable of it. 

"Do you have a name?" he asked.

The little guy shook his head. "Lightning fish called me Eepseel. Don't know what it means."

Dean had a feeling it meant something like food. He liked the cadence of it though and thought. He glanced over to the tv, which was still on to some David Attenborough film. There was a stack of DVDs beside it and from here he could read the name of one old Western: Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid.

Cassidy. Eepseel. 

"Cas?" he asked, smiling, "Caspeel? No, how about Castiel?"

"Cas!" the creature chirped.

"Cas it is then." Dean smiled. That would be a lot easier than calling him the thing all of the time.

"Cas and Dean." Cas mouthed. "Yes. Yes. And home. Like this very much. Thank you Dean."

Dean was positively beaming. His apartment wasn't much, but the fact that Cas liked it was so big and so important. Other than Sam he'd never had someone so dependant on him before and he'd forgotten how much he loved it. 

"You want to see the rest of the apartment?" he offered.

"Yes please!" Cas nodded. 

Dean released him so he could hold the jar more steadily and they walked through the messy confines together. Dean told him what each room was and it's purpose and Cas was always very complimentary. His favorite rooms were the kitchen and Dean's bedroom. 

They stopped at the window, seeing the dark clouds burble in the sky. Cas curled around himself again but he stayed at the top of the jar, looking out at the oncoming darkness.

"Looks like we're going to have a storm tonight." Dean hummed. He liked storms. 

Cas didn't say anything to that, but he looked up at Dean with his large blue eyes like he wanted to.


	5. Sleeping With the Light On

There was the rumble of thunder at around 3am and it was followed by a shrill squeaking. Dean rolled over and covered his ears with a pillow. He needed his sleep. He had a full day of work ahead of him the next day and he needed to be alert for it. 

 

He could still hear the rumbling of thunder, but it now seemed far away. The squeaking sound wasn't stopping though and it sounded desperate. He groaned as he pulled the pillow off from his head. Maybe it was a mouse or something that got caught somewhere. He hoped not. 

It wasn't a mouse though.

It was Cas.

He was at the bottom of his tank, tentacles curled around him. Even through the glass Dean could see him shaking. This was more than just fear of a storm. 

Dean reached into the water, trying to get to Cas and calm him, but the little creature panicked. He wrapped his tentacles around Dean's finger and pulled it closer so he could bite. His teeth were sharp and they drew blood and Dean was yelping, pulling his finger away. 

"Shit!"

Cas swam until he was at the edge of the jar, protected on most sides. He curled back in on himself and resumed his trembling. 

"Sorry." he muttered, "Sorry..."

Dean wrapped the tank up in his arms, holding it to his chest. His finger was throbbing but that didn't matter. Cas was scared and he just wanted to soothe him. 

"It's okay. It's just a storm. Nothings coming to get you."

"Lightning." Cas squeaked and that was it. This wasn't just fear. This was an episode. Cas had been left in a tank with lightning fish, who were going to eat him. This was Post Traumatic Stress and lightning was a trigger. Dean would have to be more careful with him. 

"I'm going to run a bath." Dean told him, nice and slow and calm, "Make a big tank that both of us can fit in, okay? And then I'm going to take you out of your tank."

Cas pulled out of his knot of tentacles to look up at him. He looked terribly confused and lost and terrified. 

"We're going to be in the bath together, the big tank. And I'm going to keep you on my chest, okay? And everything's going to be alright."

He took Cas into the bathroom with him, set the tank in the tub and ran the water. He didn't want to freeze himself, he wanted the water to be plenty warm, but he didn't know how much heat Cas could take. He told him to let him know if it was too warm though. 

Cas just squeaked and tightened up at another roll of thunder. 

When there was enough water Dean told Cas not to look and he stripped. He lay down in the tub, on his back, head resting against the back, and placed a washcloth over his penis and thighs. Then he tipped the pickle jar and Cas slid out into the tub. 

He moved Cas onto his chest and stroked his tentacles until the shaking stopped. He was half in the water, half out, the gills on his narrow hips submerged. 

"Mama take this badge off of me. I can't use it anymore." Dean sung softly. He wasn't a good singer, but Cas seemed to enjoy it and he slowly stretched out as he crooned Dylan's sad lines. 

Dean opened his eyes when he was done singing and Cas was laid out over him, tentacles swirling lazily in the water as he stared up at him. 

"Hey Cas." Dean smiled, petting his hair. It was long and ratty. Cas had never had a haircut, he supposed, and he'd just ripped the strands in half when it got too long. He'd have to get that looked at.

"Hello Dean." Cas murmured. He sounded tired and the bags under his eyes were darker than usual. 

Cas picked at one of Dean's chest hairs, not tugging but curling it in his fingers. 

"You okay?" Dean asked. 

"Curious." Cas bit at his lip. "Why so good to me? Give a lot for me. Can't do anything for you. Too good."

Dean chuckled and his fingers left Cas's hair to trail down his back. "Why am I so good to you? I don't know. You just seemed to need it. And I like giving it."

"Can't repay." 

"You pay me back by being here, Cas." Dean promised. "You give me something to look forward to at work, give me company, and you like my singing, which is more than anyone's ever done."

Dean glanced down at the washcloth covering his thighs, "You help me out a lot more than you know."

Cas pressed his cheek into Dean's chest, cuddling against him. His arms were splayed out, hugging him as best he could. 

"Is okay if sleep with you night?" he asked, groggily.

It would hurt and Dean's neck would be sore in the morning, but he liked this, liked having Cas up against him. "Yeah. Of course."

Dean did not have any nightmares that night and Cas was a nice warm weight over his heart.


	6. Until the sun comes up

The nightmare came again, as it usually did. Dean normally didn't go two nights without the nightmare and it rarely ever adjusted. This time though, there was a slight difference. When he ran into Sam's nursery the floor was wet, even though there was fire everywhere. His socks were soaking through when his dad came in, grabbed Sam and pushed him into Dean's arms. 

He tried to run out of the house, just like always, but he when he kept ending up in the nursery again, there was an added jar, a simple empty pickle jar on the desk. Each time there was another one. There was no one in it though, no water. 

Then he opened the door and there were no jars. They had all tumbled off of the desk and were a tangled mess of broken glass on the floor. He was still holding Sam in his arms but now he was screaming, calling out Cas's name. 

Once again he was woken up by a wet tentacle slapping him on the cheek. 

Once again he turned and saw the little creature lying on the pillow beside him, chest heaving, watching him with worry and suffocation. He grabbed him and put him back in the water of his pickle jar.

"What are you doing?" Dean asked, looking in as Cas caught up on his breathing. "Are you trying to kill yourself?"

"Woke you up." he wheezed, "You scream sometimes."

Dean turned away from him, redness growing in his cheeks. He ran a hand through his hair. "Yeah. Sorry about that."

"Bad sleep?" Cas asked, obviously struggling with what he was trying to say.

"Bad dream." Dean corrected, "And yeah."

Cas cocked his head to the side but said nothing. He wanted Dean to tell him but he wouldn't say that. It was all up to Dean. 

He didn't want to say. 

"When I was little, I was in fire.This guy, Azazel, thought he was going to bring about the end of the world. I don't know why he wanted to. But part of his plan was to torture and burn certain people. My mom was one of them. I grabbed Sammy, my brother, and headed out of there."

"That's your, um, dream?"

"Yeah. I didn't even see my mom burn but I can see it in my head, when I dream."

"And the man who hurt your family?"

"Dead. My dad went after him, made it his life work to find the guy who hurt our family."

Cas thought on that, squinting up at Dean as if trying to find the information he wanted on Dean's face. "Is that a good thing or bad?"

Dean was surprised by the question. "Well, uh, killing anyone is... Is bad. But the guy was still hurting people, was doing the same thing to other people that he did to mine."  
"So he is a hero."

"Yeah, that's my dad." Dean sighed, "A real, honest to goodness hero."

"You're a hero too." Cas smiled up at him as if he were able to hear Dean's doubts.

"I'm not a hero, Cas." Dean corrected, "I work at a lumber yard."  
"You saved me. You're a hero."

Dean couldn't help but smile at that. He didnt think he deserved the words of praise, but he knew not to fight a compliment. 

"What happened?" Cas asked.

"What do you mean?"

"After Azazel died. What happened?"

Dean didn't want to talk about this. It was even more than the dream. He didn't like talking about his past at all. 

"Don't you think we should be sleeping?" he asked. 

"I don't need to sleep much." Cas shrugged. "I like talking. I like you. I want know more."

No one wanted to know about Dean. No one cared. He was just a pretty face and a strong back, someone who was good for a quick screw. The only person who ever wanted to talk was Sam and they didn't have to go over the past. They had been there together. 

"What about you?" Dean tried to shift the subject, "Want to talk about your past?"

"I said everything." Cas looked hurt by that, "Kept in tanks with lightning fish, raised to be fed. No family. Always left in dark."

"Yeah, yeah, I know." Dean interjected, rubbing a thumb down the creatures spine, just between his fins. "I'm sorry."

He didn't want to talk about himself, but it looked like he didn't have much of a choice. 

"After that we finally stopped. We were moving around a lot looking for Azazel and when he was finally dead we had the opportunity to settle down. Sam started to get really into school, which was good, great, and my dad got a job at the lumberyard, where I work now.

"But there was an accident. I dropped out of school, didn't want to go home. Didn't want him to know and be disappointed in me. That means I didn't do well, he would be mad at me. I was driving, just going everywhere. I was in a car crash. 

"Dad got drunk. He'd always been a drinker. But well, me in the hospital, I guess he didn't know how to cope. He drank heavily and, well, you've seen those ads on tv right? The ones about drinking and driving?"

Cas nodded.

"Yeah, well, my dad crashed on the way over. Two cars, one right after the other. He didn't make it. I did. I inherited the car, rebuilt it. Sam graduated high school and went to college, he's almost done. I work now."

"Blame yourself?"

"For Dad's death?" Dean smiled queasily, "Every day."

Cas grabbed one of his fingers, holding it close, practically hugging it. "You're still good man." he cooed, "Not your fault."

"If I hadn't of dropped out Dad would still be alive."

"You didn't know that would happen. You're good."

Dean smiled, genuinely that time and rubbed Cas's head, his hair soft under his thumb. 

"Thanks Cas. You like it here, right?"

"Very much." and then he hesitated, as if he wasn't sure, "Can I stay?"

"What? Is there somewhere you were planning to go?"

"No, just. I want to be here. I don't want to make unhappy."

Dean wished that he could hug the little guy, hug him for real. He couldnt though, he was much too small. 

"You make me very happy." he promised. 

And Cas smiled at that.


	7. that's the life I'd choose

Friday. Fridays were the best. Dean had Friday off and he spent it grocery shopping and cooking all of his meals for the rest of the week. If he didnt he'd be stuck on diner food and that was never good for his waistband. 

It was a day that he had with Cas and they could talk and he could teach Cas a bit of reading so he could help Dean with recipes. He was able to speak conversationally and it was obvious that he had learned from documentaries. He spoke with the eloquence of Attenborough and the grammar of a professor. 

But the best thing about Friday was that Sam was coming over. He came over every Friday and, even though Dean always reminded him to bring pie, he always forgot to. This led to a lot of teasing and roughhousing, but it was good. Hell, it was the best. Dean missed Sam, missed watching out for him, and, secretly, he missed having his brother watch out for him back. 

They had stopped calling to plan their weekly visits a while back. It had just become tradition and the call was unnecessary. That was where the problem lay. 

Because Dean completely forgot to tell Sam about Cas.

When Sam buzzes and Dean unlocks the front so Sam can get into the apartment, he realized his folly. He wondered if he should hide Cas, if he should warn Sam at the door, if he should just let Sam find Cas on his own. Cas was squeaking, worried, watching Dean pace. It wasn't his normal behavior and Cas was filled with concern. He wished he was larger so he could protect Dean from anything, including his own thoughts.

Sam didnt knock, he never did, but he wrapped Dean in a big hug, his hair tickling Dean's nose.   
"You need a haircut." Dean complained.

"And hello to you, too." Sam chuckled, hitting him in the spine lightly before pulling away, "How are you doing?"

"I'm fine." Dean nodded, "Really good, actually?"

Sam's eyes went big and he lowered himself so he wasn't towering over his big brother, "You sure?"

Dean smiled, "Yeah. I'm not just saying I'm fine to get you off my back. I really am. Feeling better than I have in a long time."

Sam's smile stretched, "Good! That's great to hear."

Sam didn't bother to take off his shoes, he just headed towards the kitchen. Kid was probably starving. He always was now that he was at college. It took up all of his time and he sometimes forgot to eat. He used to only eat salads and health food, but now he would come over and eat everything in Dean's fridge if he wasn't careful.

"Dude." Dean said from the doorway. He wasn't moving to follow his brother, fear stilling his spine, to see his reaction to Cas. "You forgot the pie!"

"What?" Sam laughed, as if this were the first time. It didn't stop him from going into the kitchen though. 

And then there was a scream.

"What is this thing?" Sam was yelling and there was a loud squeak as well. Dean didn't want to move but Cas sounded just as freaked out as Sam and there was no way he could get around this. 

He headed into the kitchen, seeing Sam's face really close to the pickle jar and Cas in the back of it, curling in on himself as Sam looked in on him. 

"What the hell?" he looked from the tank up to Dean, eyes still huge. 

"I got a pet." Dean shifted awkwardly on the balls of his feet. 

"It looks like a person!" 

"Yeah, yeah, I know."

"Dean!" Cas squeaked, looking up at him. He went to the side of the tank, putting a hand inside. Cas immediately clung to his fingers, tentacles wrapping around them as he buried his face in Dean's skin. 

"It can talk?" Sam's jaw dropped even further. 

"Dude, would you calm down?" Dean growled, "You're scaring him."

"I'm scaring him?" Sam gesticulated, "What the hell is that thing Dean? What is it doing here? What they hell is happening?"

"You wanna go outside and have a breather, Sam." it wasn't a question.

"But..."

"Just go outside, breathe, calm down. Then come back in and we'll discuss this. All three of us, okay?"

Sam looked like a balloon too full of air. Then he exhaled and he lost the inhuman aspect of himself, relaxing a bit and looking somewhat embarrassed. "Yeah, sure."

Sam left quietly and as soon as he was out of sight Dean leaned down to the water, telling Cas that it was alright. Cas was slow to unwrap from Dean's hand, and he kept one tentacle curled around his index finger regardless. 

"I am sorry." Cas looked up at him, "He was just very loud and very large."

"Yeah, Sam's a monster. Sorry about the yelling. He's a good kid, really."

"I know." Cas rubbed his cheek against one of Dean's knuckles, "You love him very much. He is the best brother imaginable. I assume I just surprised him."

"Yeah, once he's good and calm, you'll see. He'll start asking you a bunch of questions that might make you uncomfortable and he'll be really interested and great. I promise."

"I like your promises, Dean." Cas was quiet but Dean could still barely hear him, "You always mean them and you always follow through."

When Sam did come back in he was a lot more calm and smiling and he apologized for yelling to Cas. The little guy swam up to the top of his jar and shook Sam's hand, which was pretty funny to see. They spoke a lot, Cas asking more questions than Sam, which surprised Dean, until dinner was ready. 

That was when they were quiet other than some questions about how work was going and finals. Sam admitted that he had brought his laptop so he could work on his essay while he was there. That was fine. It was always fine. It wasn't like Sam even liked watching movies after dinner. It was just that Dean liked to and they liked making fun of them together while they ate licorice and peanut butter and banana sandwiches. 

Cas was with them at the table and Sam watched as Dean fed him tiny bits of his meal. He was a lot healthier now than he had been when Dean had saved him, and Sam could hardly see the previous neglect. 

"You need to get Cas a tank." he noted.

"Yeah, I know." Dean grumbled. "I keep planning to but I keep getting too busy or working late."

"Well do it soon, okay?" Sam took another bite, "You don't like it in a pickle jar do you Cas?"

The creature cocked his head at Sam, "It's much better than where I was before." he admitted. 

Sam looked down. He was a smart kid. He knew not to push into that territory. "Good." was all he said. 

When they were finished eating, Dean picked up their dishes and headed to the kitchen. He had to wash the dishes and clean everything up before they could continue to hang out. Normally Sam would read while he waited but not tonight. 

"So, how did you and Dean, well, you know?" Sam asked, leaning on his elbows to peer into Cas's jar. 

"I was in a pet store. I was in a bad place." Cas admitted, "I was just food for other animals. He felt sorry for me and he purchased me to get me out of there."  
"He saved you." 

"Yes."

"He's a good guy." Sam drank slowly from his beer, "The best actually. Always puts everyone else ahead of himself. He'd rather starve than see you with a hole in your jeans, he's that kind of guy."

There was a but in there and even Cas could recognize it. 

"You're excluding something." he looked up at Sam. Without the yelling he wasn't scared of Sam at all.

He only knew good things about Sam. He did not know about the months of addiction that Dean had had to hold him through, the withdrawals and cold turkey that Dean had carried him through. He only knew about the law school and the scholarships and how Dean had taken care of him when their dad was too busy on his hunt for Azazel.

Sam swallowed and turned away from him. 

"I'm worried I disappoint him." Sam admitted. "I'm not good enough. I should be working, not hanging around learning how to be a lawyer. He got a job to take care of me right away. He never stops working. I feel like I've been self-" 

"Stop." Cas interrupted him. He only knew disappointment from Dean's definition of it and he knew the truth. "Dean would not stop speaking about you. Not once today. He is not disappointed in you. He has never been disappointed. You are his brother and he loves you more than anything else. He is proud of you. He is also a bit sorry that he never reached for something he wanted the way you have with school. He has not said so but I can tell."

Sam beamed. "You really think so?"

"Yes."

They both turned as Dean walked back into the room, wiping his hands on a dishtowel. 

"So what are you girls talking about?" he chuckled.

Sam rolled his eyes and muttered "Jerk" under his breath.

The sentiment was returned with a wink and "Bitch."

Sam grabbed his bag though and Dean grabbed Cas in his tank and they headed to the living room to watch Indiana Jones. Sam was working on his finals, of course, but Cas was entranced and he kept asking questions. Dean had to explain to him that it was fiction and that none of the events were real, but that didn't seem to impeded his enthusiasm.


	8. I'm Fire

Dean noticed it in the morning, a thick slimy feeling in his throat that went to the aching hot pain in his gut. It was bile. He didn’t want to be sick, not on his second day off. Fridays were the best and Saturdays he had for resting and getting everything in the apartment taken care of. 

He felt clammy though and tired and he just wanted to stay in bed. 

Cas was watching him though and he was hungry, making small peeping sounds as he looked over Dean’s pale skin. He could see that something wasn’t right with the human, but he couldn’t tell what.

So Dean groaned and moved to the kitchen, getting breakfast ready. He normally didn’t leave Cas behind and when he returned, a plate of toast and a hard boiled egg on his plate, it was clear that Cas was worried. 

He was at the bottom of his tank, tentacles wrapped around himself, eyes wide and staring up at Dean. 

Dean sighed and dropped some crumbs of toast into the bowl. Cas was not eager to eat them though, he just kept watching. 

"I’m fine." Dean shrugs, “I think I’m coming down with something."

Cas just stared at him. 

"It means I’m getting sick." Dean clarified. “The best thing for me to do is ignore it though, do what needs to be done."

"What needs to be done is you getting healthy." Cas pointed out, finally catching some of the crumbs and eating them. 

"Mind over matter." Dean argued. 

But he was looking at Cas now, really looking, and he noticed something new. Cas was a lot healthier than he had been a week before, yes, but there were other changes. His tentacles had blue in them, the same color as his eyes, and it was odd little shapes that he could not trace. 

He was larger too. At least an inch longer than he had been. Dean wanted to ask, but he had found that Cas had the same amount of answers that he did. 

He shrugged and finished his breakfast, passing some of his egg to Cas as well. He got dressed, making sure Cas covered his eyes as usual, and got ready to head out. Sitting around moping wouldnt make him feel any better, but there may be some way he could learn more about what Cas was. 

—-

There was one person that Dean knew would have answers for him and that was the creepy mysterious pet shop owner who was trying to kill him in the first place. 

Dean didn’t feel like he should be driving, he didnt feel like he should be doing anything, and he kept swallowing the bile that tried to rise up. He kept thinking about that customer on Thursday, the one who sweated too much and coughed into his hand before shaking Dean’s. 

He hated germs enough anyway.

He was sure the pet store owner wouldnt tell him anything but he really wasn’t in the mood for polite conversation and he thought he may be able to intimidate the facts out of him. But then he arrived.

There wasn’t even smoke.

Dean slowed the Impala down as he drove by, seeing the caution tape and police keeping people away. The whole building had been burned down and there was no sign that anyone or anything had survived. It must have been the day before or something, the whole thing was just charcoal and ash.

Dean drove off. He would find no answers there.

—-

Sam must have had an extra key to Dean’s apartment, because he came over unannounced. Cas could hear him rummaging in the kitchen and he could tell immediately that it wasn’t Dean. Dean wasn’t as quiet and he always said hello when he came home. 

Cas had been left in the bedroom all day and he was aching for something to see. Normally Dean would leave him with the tv or something but not today. He wasn’t feeling well enough to take care of both of them. 

Sam stood in the doorway, eating a poorly constructed sandwich and Cas brightened up in his jar. 

"Hello Sam." he smiled. 

"Hey Castiel." Sam stepped inside. He looked like he was uncomfortable in Dean’s room. 

"Dean did not tell me you were coming."

"Yeah, he didn’t know. I wanted to surprise him." Sam picked up the pickle jar and Cas did not like this at all. He found that he did not like surprises and he did not feel safe in Sam’s hands. He did not feel like Dean. 

"What." he gripped onto the edge of the tank, “What are you going to do?"

"I think it’s time we made you presentable." was all Sam answered and then they were in the bathroom and Sam was filling the sink up with water. There were scissors and a small comb on the counter and Cas didn’t know what to think of that. He didn’t know what Sam was planning.

Sam put his hand in the pickle jar and waited though, wiggling his fingers when Cas didn’t immediately climb on. “Hey, I’m not going to hurt you." he promised, “I’m just going to give you a hair cut."

At that Cas was on him, tentacles curling around fingers, body pressed against his palm. He’d wanted a haircut for so long. His hair was long and unruly and it kept getting into his eyes. 

Sam’s hair was pretty long and Cas wasn’t sure if he really could cut hair, but anything was better than what he had now.

He lifted him up and put him in the sink. The water was a bit warm and Cas relaxed into it facing away from Sam. 

"You think Dean will like this?" he asked. He did not want to upset Dean.

"Yeah, you’ll look less like a bum." Sam chuckled, picking up the scissors.

They spoke while Sam cut, mostly about Dean, and Cas learned a lot. He learned about Dean’s love of pie and bad movies and how he was so good at taking care of Sam when he was sick, although he could tell that there was more to it then that. Sam gave him advice on how to take care of Dean too, since he was ‘coming down with something’. 

When Sam was done Cas looked in the mirror. He had seen his reflection a few times, but never so clear. His hair was short and thick and perfect, easily ruffled and so much softer than before. 

He thanked Sam profusely. 

—-

Sam was gone by the time Dean came home and Cas was back in his jar in Dean’s bedroom. He couldn’t stop running his fingers through his silky hair and humming tunes from commercials to himself. 

Dean practically collapsed into his bed beside him, a large empty fish tank in his arms. He’d finally picked one up at a petstore on his way home and the seller had given hi a bunch of information and rocks and things to make it a perfect habitat. 

Cas pulled himself to the rim of his jar and looked down at Dean. He was not well at all. He wondered if he should implement something he had learned from Sam or not. 

Dean groaned though and rolled over, looking over at Cas. His eyes were red and there were heavy bags under them. 

"Hey Cas." he smiled, shakily.

"Hello Dean." he tried to sound as soothing as possible. 

Dean reached out for him, fingers gentle and clammy as they touched his head, carded through his hair. 

"Hair cut."

"Sam did it. I hope that you approve."

"Always. You look good Cas. Really handsome." 

And with that Dean fell asleep, cuddling up to a fish tank, fully clothed.


	9. You're the Rhythm

Dean groaned and rolled out of bed. He spent more time in the bathroom than usual. He came back and slid back into bed and hid his face with his blanket, which fell away back to his shoulders almost immediately. 

Cas woke to his grumbling and watched him, still a bit groggy from sleep. He leaned over the edge of his jar and took in Dean's features. He looked worse than the day before. He was paler and his eyes and nose were more red. There was a sheen of sweat coating his skin and a slight tremble to him.

Cas thought back to all of the things Sam had said, all the different ways that you can take care of someone when they were sick. He felt terrible. Most of them were impossible for him to do. He was much too small to make Dean soup or run a bath for him or pour him ginger ale and mop up his sweat with a washcloth. 

He was too small for most anything and he really, truly, wanted to take care of Dean. 

The next time Dean woke up he was wiping at his forehead and mumbling to himself. Cas told him to call in sick to work, but Dean just swatted him away. He muttered something about money and Alistair being a massive tool and rolled over.

It was Cas that climbed out of his tank, wriggled under the blankets, and grabbed Dean's phone from his pocket. It was heavy for him and he had to drag it, each breath coming in harder than the last. He had no real lungs, and air was difficult for him to take, although he was starting to breathe out of water better than he used too. He dropped the phone by Dean's hand and rushed back to his tank, breathing in deep gasps once he was back under water. 

Dean grumbled angrily but flipped his phone open and dialed. Alistair's voice was calm and cheery and a little bit slow on the other side. 

Dean didn't make any real words into the phone, but his boss seemed to guess what was going on and gave his permission to take the day off. Dean wouldnt get any real work done in that condition and Alistair knew he wouldnt ask for the day off unless he really needed it. 

Dean fell back asleep after that. 

Cas watched him for a while, arms crossed over the lip to his jar. It was getting much too small for him. He watched how Dean breathed though, ragged and without rhythm, how it made his chest rise and fall.

"I like you, Dean." Cas said, sure that Dean was too asleep to hear him, "I like you a lot. and not just because you saved me. You're kind and warm and so giving, not just to me but to Sam too. When I'm around you I feel better, like my chest is full, and like breathing comes easier. I know I'm not the easiest to be around, I'm tiny and needy, but you always seem so patient with me."

Dean sighed and turned over. Cas wasn't sure if he wanted him to hear this confession or not. 

"I know you're just being friendly, that this is who you are. I know it's impossible for you to like me the same way that I like you. But that doesn't stop it. That doesn't make me like you any less. I just wish that I could do something, anything, to help you. To make me worth your time."

Dean mumbled something and wiped at his eyebrows with the back of his arm. Cas was no longer so confident to speak. What if he woke up? What if he didn't want Cas's affections? What if he was mad? Cas didn't want any of that. 

But Dean didn't say anything more and his eyes didn't open and he didn't stop sweating. Sam had said that a cold wet washcloth would help him, but Cas didn't have that. He did have cold wet tentacles though. 

He held his breath and climbed out of his tank, just like he had when Dean had had nightmares. He lay his tentacles over Dean's forehead though and the trembling slowed down a bit. 

"You're so hot." Cas mentioned and Dean's lips curled up at the edges. He hadnt meant it in the way Dean took it, but if it made him feel better then that was fine. 

Cas was starting to pant and gasp and he climbed back into his tank to breathe. 

He moved from one to the other, his tank to Dean's forehead, until it was no longer such a terribly hot temperature and then Cas leaned down, laying a small little kiss to the spot just between Dean's eyebrows. 

He was about to move away when Dean moaned, "No." and he paused, stock still, "Don't stop."

Cas kissed him again, but his gills were flaring, trying to drag in air that he could actually breathe. He couldn't be out here any longer. 

He dashed back to his jar and gasped as he swallowed down air and water once more. 

Dean opened his eyes though and was looking at him, somewhat bewildered and still exhausted. 

"Were you taking care of me?" he asked and it sounded almost cognizant. 

"Mmhmm." was all Cas replied. 

"Ugh." Dean curled in on himself. "I still feel terrible."

"You're too hot." Cas explained, "You need to cool down."

"Cold bath?" Dean looked at him, almost pleading, and Cas realized that he was silently asked Cas to join him. 

He nodded.


	10. Need Some Air to Clear My Head

Dean still wasn't feeling 100% but he went to work anyway. He couldnt afford to stick around at home too much. Cas whined and told him not to, but if he didn't the little creature would get spoiled by his presence and he'd never get a moment alone. 

So he went to work and listened to Alistair sing show tunes out of tune and lifted and carried and sweated through his fever, doing as much as he could in his condition. 

It wasn't unusual for Alistair to walk through the yard with a client, picking out 2x4s and samples and other things that they may be needing, but it was unusual for him to walk through the yard with someone like her. 

She was wearing a gray pantsuit and was pretty in a maturnly way. There was something about her that was just a bit too strict and Dean didn't trust her immediately. She didn't seem interested in wood at all, that nor the things that Alistair was saying to her. Her eyes kept going back to Dean, to the sweat seeping through his shirt, to the way he handled the materials around him. 

She asked Alistair for a glass of water or coffee or something, Dean wasn't paying that much attention, and when he agreed, leaving her alone with Dean, she approached him, wearing an extremely practiced smile. 

"You have beautiful hands." she remarked as he set some uncut timber down. "Strong and masterful. You could kill a man with hands like that. But they're still delicate, smooth, kind."

"Dean." he introduced but he did not move to shake her hand. 

"Naomi." her speaking was as practiced as her smile. 

They looked at each other and she squinted. There was something else she had wanted to say. She wanted him to speak first though and he had nothing. He shrugged, done with waiting, and went back to work. 

"Those are the kind of hands that could care for a very small creature, aren't they?" she asked. Dean stilled, turning to look at her. "A creature that's delicate and tiny, unable to defend itself. Those hands could make the strangest of creatures feel mighty."

"What are you talking about?" But he already knew. 

"You have a very rare pet, Mr. Winchester." he hadn't given her his last name, "You don't know what you're doing with it. You know nothing about it."

"I know more about him than you'd think." he corrected. 

"Oh really?" she crossed her arms and kicked at the dust, "Well I'd like to learn more. How much would you sell it for?"

"He's not for sale." Dean swallowed hard. He could feel a knot growing in his stomach. Who was this woman? How did she know he had Cas?

"A thousand dollars?" she offered, "Two?"

"He's not for sale."

"Don't make this difficult for yourself, Mr. Winchester. I can make your life very miserable. I suggest you cooperate."

"I don't cooperate with people who threaten me. How do you know about Cas?"

"Cas? Oh that's a precious name." she stepped closer to him and he was looking around, wondering what was taking Alistair so damn long. He needed someone there, even that sleaze, just anyone to get this woman away from him. "I know about him from the fool who sold him to you. He told us everything while his store burned down in front of him."

"That was you..."

"Now you see what you're dealing with"

There was an exclamation and Dean started to breathe. He hadnt realized that he'd been holding his breath but the moment he saw Alastair in the distance he felt much more comfortable. 

The plastic smile came back to her lips but she didn't stop talking until Alistair was upon them, "It's worthless, you know? Once it matures you won't want it, no one wants those things after that. They're only good for breeding purposes and then as food for the Lightning fish. You know how much those fish cost on their own? A fortune. The pet store owner you met was selling them for pennies on the dime."

"I want him."

"You say that now but just you wait. Once he reaches full size you'll want him gone."

She turned to Alistair then and accepted the iced coffee he had brought her. She made a face as she took a sip of it but pretended it was good and then she left Dean, returning to look over wood samples with the owner. 

Dean spat in the dirt and returned to work. There was no way he was going to sell Cas to someone like that. The thought alone put a bad taste in his mouth. It worried him that she had found him so easily though. 

He worked hard, trying not to think about what had just happened. 

He didn't go home after work though. He wanted to be with Cas, wanted to make sure he was safe, but he felt like he was being watched and he didn't want Naomi to figure out where he lived. 

He went to a bar instead. And he smiled at girls. And he drank. And then he talked to some. And then he drank some more. And then he kept going until that bad taste in his mouth was gone.


	11. Love is Something Inbetween

There was a loud crash which was followed by giggles and Cas turned towards the door, hoping to see Dean. There was a second voice giggling too though and Cas did not know what to think of that. 

It was late. There were no lights on and he could only see by the light of the television. Dean should have been home hours ago. He'd been worried. He knew that there was a chance that he was working late, but never this late. He'd feared the worst, ads for car insurance giving him images of crashes.

When Dean came into view he looked ill, pale and sweaty, and he could not walk in a straight line. He was smiling, hugely, and he was tugging along some girl who was quickly trying to remove her clothes. She was stumbling too, but not as badly as Dean. 

She wasn't very pretty, not by Cas's standards, but Dean didn't seem to care. All he seemed to care about was laughing and kissing her, lips curling and tongue dipping into her mouth. 

Cas curled in on himself, watching the display. Was this Dean's lover? Was this someone he cared deeply for? Why hadn't he said anything to Cas about her? What did all this mean?

He felt a cold knot turn his stomach as he remembered all the sweet things he had confessed to the human and how it was so obvious that Dean would never feel the same way. Why would he? He was an ugly thing, tiny and suckered, with tentacles. He could not do the amazing things this girl was doing with her mouth. 

She was on her knees now, mouthing at Dean's erection through his jeans as he ran fingers through her hair and worked at his zipper. Cas was transfixed, staring, even while he was cowering. Dean pulled out his penis and it was a long curve with strong veins and a dusting a freckles. Even if he'd wanted Cas there was nothing Cas could do with such a beautiful extremity. It was almost the same size that Cas had been when Dean had found him. 

And she was slurping at it, sucking, looking up at Dean as she bopped her head back and forth, licking at his cock. Dean was enjoying it, head thrown back as he moaned, trying to keep his own hips steady. The girl's hands were between her legs and Cas could not tell what she was doing with them, but she was moaning from it. 

Cas curled in tighter, not wanting to see, as a chocked sob made it out of his throat. He could not cry, he was not able, but he wanted too. 

Then Dean grabbed the girl, pushed her over the side of the couch and she was giggling all over again. He stood and waited, looking at the view, her legs spread before him. Only after she told him to hurry up and fuck her did he move, did he slid inside of her. Cas couldn't see her now, the back of the couch hiding her from view, but he could see the pistoning of Dean's hips, the pleasure on his face. And he could hear the sounds, the deep breathy moans coming from Dean, the high pitched yelps and exclamations from the girl. 

He pulled away from her slowly and she changed position, getting back on the floor on her hands and knees. Dean knelt down behind her and entered her from behind. The sounds were more intense and now Cas couldn't see anything but what was happening. She was facing him but not looking at him, the looks on her face something between pleasure and pain, and she was gasping and moaning and shaking as Dean's hips snapped. 

Then the television brightened and the room was illuminated. She could finally see into the tank, see the creature inside, and then she was screaming. She pulled away from Dean, grabbing her clothing and pulling to her chest. 

"What the hell is that thing?" she was was pointing and screaming, getting dressed as quickly as she could, "What the fuck! It was, it was fucking watching us!"

"Hey!" Dean's face turned from that look of ecstasy to anger, quickly, "He's fine! No need to worry about him."

"It's got a human face!" she didnt bother to put her underwear on, just put her jeans on over it. "It's creepy! Who the hell invites someone over to have something spy on them fuck! Does it get you off having some monster like that watch?"

"What? It's not like that." Dean was walking after her, but she was running to the door, "He's not like that."

She wasn't listening and she grabbed her shoes as she left, slamming the door behind her. 

Dean leaned against the door and sighed, shaking, before sliding down into a sitting position. He slid his half hard penis back into his jeans. He did not move after that. 

Cas was worried. He was a monster. He was a little creepy monster who had watched them. He was scary. He was not pretty. He was not what Dean wanted. And he may have just destroyed Dean's relationship with the girl. 

Dean didn't move until he heard a squeaky apology from the tank, then his red rimmed eyes were huge and he was staring at Cas. He stood up, legs still not willing to support him, and headed to the kitchen counter, falling into one of the chairs there. 

"I'm sorry." Cas hide his face in his hands, "I ruined everything. You were enjoying yourself and I broke it. She's never going to want to come back. I'm sorry."

Dean hadn't even thought about Cas when he'd come home. He was drunk and he had someone willing to screw him, someone who wouldn't care that he kept his jeans on. He should have thought. He should have at least taken it to a different room. 

"It's not your fault." he groaned. 

"You loved her. You wanted to be with her, but I'm so disgusting. I'm an ugly little monster and I don't deserve to be here. I ruined your chances of having a family with her."

"Hey!" Dean's eyes locked on his and he seemed more sober than before. "Who said you were disgusting? You said you were ugly?" 

Cas wanted to flee. He wanted to hide. There was no where in his tank though, although it was much larger than his pickle jar. 

"Come here." Dean pleaded. 

Cas didn't want to but he rose to the surface of the tank. What if Dean was done with him now? What if he was going to leave him? 

Dean's touch was soft though and he traced the shape of Cas's jaw before he ruffled his short hair. "You're none of those things, okay Cas? You're not ugly and you're not disgusting, and you're not a monster. You're really freaking adorable, you got that? And you're sweet and you take care of me. You keep me from doing some really bad things that I have a habit of doing. I'm the one who should be apologizing."

"You loved her..." Cas couldn't believe what Dean was saying, it couldn't have been true. He was nothing. But he did not want to dwell on it. 

"No. Cas that was sex. Sex and love... they aren't mutually exclusive. Sure you have sex with someone you love, but you can have sex and not love them too. It just feels good. We were just feeling good."

"Really?" he felt relieved at that for some strange reason.

"Really. I don't even know her name." 

"I'm not gross?" 

"Not now. Not ever." Dean promised. 

Cas finally leaned into Dean's touch. He smelled different then usual. "I'm sorry."

"Stop apologizing." Dean leaned in, and bumped Cas's nose with his own. It was a terribly intimate touch and that brought it all together. It amed all of the things Dean had said true. He was freaking adorable and he was not going to be left alone. 

"Sorry." Cas apologized for apologizing.

That got him a wary glare and then the tank was moving. Dean carried him to the bedroom and set the tank, now much heavier than the pickle jar, in it's usual place. 

"You don't mind staying?" Dean asked as he stretched. 

"Of course not."

"I mean, after what you saw. You might think I'm dirty or something."

Cas just cocked his head. "You are a bit dirty, but a shower should take care of that."

Dean chuckled. That wasn't the kind of dirty he had meant. But he got undressed and Cas covered his eyes as he pulled off his jeans, just as always. He would shower in the morning. The alcohol in his system was fading and the worry he had used it to keep away was coming back.

"I'm never going to let you go, okay?" Dean swore, just before he fell asleep.

"Alright." Cas smiled, "Thank you Dean."


	12. And time is running me still

It was Thursday. It was a calm, good day, and Dean was all better, both from his sickness and from his hangover. Cas was a bit more wary of him now, a bit more quiet, but Dean always showered him with attention. He was larger too, a full eleven inches, Dean would guess. It worried him that the little creature was growing so fast, not knowing how big he would end up being. At this rate he would not fit in his tank for long. 

It was getting a bit stuffy in the house and Dean decided to leave a window cracked open when he went to work. Cas was very interested in hearing the birds from outside and he brightened up immediately. Dean turned on the television and was off for the day. 

He was thinking of recipes and things to do with Sam the next day as well as what to get him for Graduation. The big day was Saturday and he still hadn’t gotten him anything. Nothing had seemed right. These thoughts filled his mind throughout the workday and made it all go much faster.

The work wasn’t too hard that day and the sun wasn’t too hot, so he actually felt a bit relaxed and happy as he headed home. He stopped by the grocery store and caught himself humming along with the music as he picked out ingredients.

His good mood was ruined the moment he opened the door. 

There was water everywhere and he rushed into the kitchen, finding the tank on the floor, on it’s side, all of the rochas and fake marine life in a chaotic tumble. 

Cas wasn’t in the tank. Cas was nowhere to be seen. 

All that there was was a messy splatter of blood and then streaks of the stuff that led further into the kitchen.

Then he sneezed and saw the cat, a big fluffy orange tabby, in front of the oven. It was on it’s side, paws deep underneath the machine, scraping and clawing for something. 

Dean ran at the cat, spooking it, but it was intent on it’s hunt. He tried to pick it up, but he slashed at him terribly and he was crying out. Still, he dragged it to the door and threw it out. 

Then he was at the oven, on his hands and knees. He could hear Cas now, could hear the shallow and pained gasps of his breath. He reached under the oven, but his hand was too big, he couldn’t get far. 

"Cas?" his voice broke as he hoped for something, “Cas, come on, Buddy. I’m here, I got you. You’re safe now. I can’t reach you. Can you… can you grab my hand?"

Silence. Then there was a voice and it was weak and scared. “Dean?"

"Yeah, yeah, hey." Dean smiled, relieved, “I’m going to take care of you. I know it’s tough buddy, but you’ve got to grab my hand. You’ve got to let me get you out of there."

Something limb and dry, with muscles under the surface, slapped into his hand before stilling. He wrapped his fingers around it and pulled. 

Cas was bloody and bleeding, gasping with his head thrown back. Dean cradled him in his hands, holding him tight and applying pressure to his wounds. There was a deep cut diagonally along his chest, and his tentacles had been cut up pretty bad as well, as was his right shoulder. 

Dean didn’t know what to do. He didn’t know how he could help. He wasn’t good at this sort of them. 

He grabbed a big water bottle though and filled it with water before easing Cas in. He knew that the water would keep the wounds open, but Cas had to breathe too. Then he was out the door, running down the stairs two at a time, hurrying to the Impala. 

He didn’t bother buckling his seatbelt. He didn’t have time.

He sped through intersections and he kept glancing over, looking at Cas. With each block his eyes were closing a little bit longer. 

Dean stopped at the Animal Hospital and rushed in, water bottle in hand. The nurses and aids were all busy, helping more common animals, but he ran to the front desk. 

"Please." he was panting. “I need help. My friend. He."

"Calm down." The nurse, Meg, said, a hand out. “Slow down. What’s going on?"

Dean placed the water bottle on the counter. She knelt to look inside. 

"What the hell is that thing?"

"Please." Dean bit his lip, “Help him."

She grabbed the jar then, with it’s pink-red water, and dashed out of the waiting room, into the main offices. Dean wanted to follow her, he wanted to be there with Cas. But he knew. He knew he would only get in the way. And if he didn’t make it. 

Dean couldn’t even think of that. 

So he took to pacing. He tried to sit and wait, but there was no way he could do that. He needed to hit something. He needed to drive. He needed to drink. He needed to feel fresh blood dripping down his thighs. 

He called Sam. 

Sam was good. Sam would know what to do. Whenever he had bad urges it was Sam who he could count on. Who would take care of him. 

Sam told him that he had to wait, that Cas was counting on him. He knew it was hard. Sam would be at the apartment when they got there. He would help Dean take care of Cas. 

Everything would be okay. 

It was an hour and a half until everything was okay. An hour and a half until a shorter man with dark hair and a darker expression came out, pulling bloody gloves from his hands. 

"Dean?" he called out and his voice was raspy, with a thick accent. 

Dean stood up. “Is he alright?" he didn’t ask how the doctor knew his name. 

"Come with me."

Dean followed him through the maze-like offices and examination rooms.

"You’re lucky. You both are." the doctor said without looking up at Dean, “He was in really bad shape. Those wounds could get infected really easily. I was able to get him stable though, patch him up."

"How?"

"I’m good at what I do."

He opened a door and there, in a large clear thing of tupperware that was only half filled, was Cas. He was lying on his back, eyes closed. There were bandages, gauze, wrapped around his wounds and a massive IV stuck in his arm, giving him blood. 

Dean was at his side in an instant.

"Just a few more minutes." the doctor explained. “Then he should have enough blood to heal up on his own. You can take him home."

"Thank you, doctor…"

"Crowley." the doctor nodded. Then he turned on his heel and vanished, the door silently closing behind him. Dean was alone with his friend and he ran his fingers through Cas’s hair and sobbed, hating how foolish he had been, and how close they had come.


	13. Stay beside me, stay beside me

Sam was there. Sam was helpful. Sam was taking such good care of Cas. 

 

The creature was lying in the bathtub, the water only so high it could covers his gills. They had placed a plate underneath his tentacles to keep them out of the water too, although they did have to run water over them every once in a while. 

Dean couldn't take care of Cas, not while Sam was there. He stood in the doorway of the bathroom, half hidden by the wall, and watched as Sam checked Cas's pulse and temperature. He paced and muttered to himself while Sam changed the bandages and checked for infection. He sat on his bed, pulled down his jeans, and stared at the mess of his thighs without any action while Sam told Cas everything was going to be alright and ran his fingers through his hair. 

Sam did have to leave eventually. There was nothing else he could do and Dean obviously needed to do this on his own. He hugged him, big strong arms pulling him close and told him to be careful, not to do anything he'd regret, before he headed out the door. 

Dean was careful to hold Cas up in the water, to keep it so he could breathe as he added more water to the bath. It was a bit warmer than Crowley had told him to make it, but Dean couldn't handle to cold and he knew Cas could handle it. They'd gone much warmer together before. 

He was quick to undress and slide into the bath, not bothering to hide his legs and groin with the washcloth like he usually did. He placed Cas on his chest, where he lay, still unconscious from the veterinarians. Dean was careful, but he couldn't stop but run his fingers along Cas's small body, soothing him with ghosting fingertips. He did not touch the bandages but he rubbed stiff and sore muscles. 

He sang songs, under his breath. He told Cas things, that everything would be alright, that he'd never let him get hurt again. He cried. He rubbed his thighs together, needing to feel something there.

"I'm so sorry." Dean wiped the tears from his eyes, "You're just. You're so important to me, you know? I'm not good at talking about this stuff, not at all. It's just... I'm so glad you're here. I don't know what I would do if you were gone. If I lost you."

Cas's breathing shifted, but he did not stir. Dean wondered if he could hear him. 

"This is going to sound weird. Oh god, don't hate me for this. But, I love you Cas. I really do. I know we're different species and the like but you've saved my life. You've saved my life in so many ways and you don't even know it. I'm so much happier now that you're here."

He resumed singing. He didn't know what else to say and he felt so embarrassed. There was no way Cas could feel the same way that he did, but he had to admit it at some point. 

He sang until he was too tired and then the singing became humming. And then he fell asleep in the bathtub with a small creature on his chest.


	14. Im Trying to Make You Mine

There was a knocking on the door. Dean had had the day off and he had spent it looking after Cas, who was finally awake but still weak and fragile. He cooked for him and fed him, tiny little bites. He changed bandages and checked the stitches for puss and swelling. He sat on the edge of the tub and told Cas stories of his childhood on the road. 

But there was a knocking and he left Cas alone for a moment. It could have been Sam, but Sam would come in on his own. He looked in the eye hole to see who it was, seeing some poorly bleached blond hair. He knew who it was immediately. 

"How did you figure out where I live?" he asked, glaring at her after pulling the door open. 

The nurse from the animal hospital smiled at him. It did not look like a real smile. "Well, hello to you too. Can I come in?"

"No." Dean put his hands on either side of the entryway. 

"Don't be such a child." she rolled her eyes. "Your address was on the forms you filled out. Of course it was easy to find you."

She pushed past him into the apartment. He should have fought her. He didn't like her. There was something off about her that he just did not like. He was just too tired to care. 

"Nice place." she looked around. It really wasnt. It was a mess. 

"Why are you here?" he crossed his arms and glared at her. 

"I'm just here to check on a patient. You don't mind do you?"

He minded. He minded a lot. But she knew what she was doing. She had to. She was a nurse. 

He led the way into the bathroom. Cas was lying on his back, drowsy, but there. He looked up at the newcomer. 

"Hey cutie." Meg said, sitting where Dean had been just moments before, "You remember me?"

"Should I?" Cas asked. 

Her eyes went wide. She stared from Cas up at Dean, mouth opening and closing a few times! "He can talk? He can really talk?"

"Yes." Cas glared at her. "I'm not a complete idiot."

"Oh my... well!" She looked from Dean to Cas and back again. Not able to get over it. "What are you?" she finally asked. 

"I don't know." Cas looked up at Dean not sure as to what to do with this person. 

"I didnt get any information out of the guy he sold him to me." Dean added. "I've just been guessing as to his care."

"You've done a great job." Cas added. 

"Well where did you get him?" Meg wasn't going to be distracted. 

"A rare pet store. But it burned down."

"Yeah. I heard about that. So no idea on anything about him?"

Dean shoo his head. "My brother's checking stuff out. He loved research. Don't know what he'll find."

"Hmm." Meg looked Cas over. "No chance of me getting one, then."

"What?"

"He's interesting and cool and really adorable. You can't expect me to not want something like that!"

Dean stood to the side, awkward and uncomfortable. He did not want her in his apartment. He did not like the fact that she had found his apartment and that that Naomi woman had found where he worked. He did not want this attention. 

And he did not like the way she was looking at Cas.

"He's a unicorn." she murmured. 

It was clear that Cas didn't like the attention either. He kept looking up at Dean, concerned, and trying to scoot away from her. 

"I'm sorry that there's nothing I can do for you." Dean held her by the elbow and gently lifted her into a standing position, "Please don't come here again. It's creepy. I'm sure you can call if you need anything."

"How much?" she blurted out. 

"What?"

"How much would you sell him for?"

Dean stared at her and then looked at Cas. The little creature was staring at him, eyes wide, terrified of what his answer may be. Dean wanted to grab him, hold him close, rub that worry away from his brow. 

"He's not for sale."

Meg ran a finger down his chest. It was supposed to be seductive, but Dean thought it was bit more threatening than anything else. 

"Oh, come on. There's got to be something that you want."

There was nothing. Dean had had a list of things he'd wanted, but it was gone now. Cas had filled those holes for him. 

"He's not for sale." he repeated and this time it came out as a growl. He grabbed her hand, hard, and marched her out of the apartment. He pushed her out and slammed the door, locking it behind her. 

He leaned against the door, back against it, and closed his eyes. There was an anger in him, a deep unbridled one. It was dangerous. He wanted to hit something or drink or fuck. He wanted to do something to get rid of it. 

"Dean?" came a small voice from the bathroom. 

Dean didn't want to go. He was so mad. He didn't want that fury to come out in front of Cas. 

The little voice came again and this time he moved, heading back to the bathroom. 

Cas was lying there, just like before, but he was propping himself up on his elbows, wincing at the pain it caused him. He smiled at Dean and Dean immediately felt much calmer. He reached down and ruffled the little guys hair. 

"Thank you, Dean." he leaned into the touch, "Thank you for not getting rid of me."

So that was what had scared Cas? Not Meg, but the thought that Dean might want to get rid of him? The anger was gone and all that was left was this feeling to care and protect. He fell to the floor and leaned over the bath. 

"I'd never get rid of you, Cas."

"Not even for sex? Or money? Or anything?"

"Not for anything. You're my best friend Cas. I'm not giving you up for the world."


	15. all the time we haven't spent

Dean didn't want to go. He didn't want to leave Cas alone in the apartment, not again, never again. But he couldn't bring Cas with him.

It was Saturday. It was graduation. Dean had to go to the campus and watch Sam graduate. Sam would understand if he didn't make it, he knew how bad of shape Cas was in, but Dean couldn't take himself out of going. Yes, he didn't want to, but when else would he have a chance to see Sam graduate college? Sam had come so far and there was nothing that would bar Dean's participation. 

It wasn't just Cas that made Dean want to stay behind though. He had neglected getting Sam anything. There was no rare gift. He had taken Cas home and he couldnt give him to Sam now. He didn't want to part from the little creature. And he had been distracted since he got Cas, he'd never gone and gotten Sam anything else.

He dug through his own possessions. He knew he didnt have anything that Sam would want, but it may have worked as some kind of IOU.

He found it in the back of a corner, in a small box. He wrapped it in newspaper and hid it in his pocket. Cas gave him permission, his blessing, and he promised that he would be fine while Dean was gone. 

The drive wasn't too long, but the wait was. Winchester was close to the end of the alphabet, which meant that he had to wait throughout the entire ceremony before Sam got to walk. He looked small from the stands, fragile, he was a little kid all over again. He was a little kid in a big black gown and a big black cap and he was going to be a big lawyer. 

No one in the stands cheered louder than Dean. 

And Dean found him afterwards. It wasn't too hard. Sam was the tallest in his class, he was the tallest anywhere. Sam was grinning and that grin only grew when he saw Dean and pulled him in for a terribly tight hug. Dean slapped him on the back when he needed to breathe and Sam released him, only to grab onto his arm. 

"Dude, what are you doing here?" he asked.

"I couldn't miss your graduation." Dean shrugged. 

"But what about Cas?"

"He told me to go."

Sam wrapped an arm around Dean's shoulders and they walked to the Impala. Sam waved and wished luck to his classmates and their families. They all had their moms and dads with them. Sam just had Dean and Dean felt bad for that. There should have been a huge family there to watch the graduation. There should have been a graduation party. 

But their family was made up of the dead. 

They were almost to the Impala when Dean paused, pulling the package out of his pocket. He handed it to Sam, apologizing as he did so, "Sorry. I've been distracted. Consider this an IOU. I'll get you something better later on."

Sam looked at him sadly and it wasn't that he was sad that Dean was giving him a crappy present. It was pity. Dean hated pity. But Sam pitied the fact that Dean thought he had to get him anything at all. 

Still he tore away the paper and when he opened the box his jaw dropped and his eyes went wide. He pulled out the cord and the bronze flashed, reflecting the sunlight. 

"You had this the whole time?" Sam's voice cracked as he looked at it. 

Sam had given Dean the necklace with the weird Mayan-esque amulet for a Christmas present back when Dean was only 10. They're dad was following a lead on Azazel which turned out to be a dead end so Sam had given it to Dean instead. 

Dean never took it off. 

He didn't take it off until Sam met Ruby in his freshman year. She was a bad influence, but pretty, and Sam's previous girlfriend had died a year before so he was naive and ready for anyone to come into his life.

Ruby destroyed him. 

She got him addicted to drugs and sex and he became a different person. Dean had thrown the necklace away after an argument, just before kicking Sam out of his life. 

Of course Sam had come back into his life, single and needing to sober up. Dean had made him go cold turkey and he held him through the withdrawals, tying him down some nights, but there was nothing that would make him leave his little brothers side. 

Of course he had gone back and saved the necklace from the garbage as soon as Sam was gone. It was a symbol of their love for one another. It was their connection. 

It still being there was that family was still there. 

"I can't take this Dean." Sam licked his lips, looking troubled. 

"I want you to have it." Dean took it from him so he could place it around Sam's neck, clasping it just right. 

"Thank you." 

"That's not all!" Dean promised. "You know I'm a lousy cook, there's delivery coming to the apartment. Some actually edible food!"

Sam smiled, "Hey, you're the best cook I know."

"You only know lousy cooks." Dean joked but he knew he was a good cook most days. 

They laughed and told stories and everything was good until they got back to the apartment.


	16. Do you want to play these cards

The door was unlocked and left ajar. There was breathing and speaking and terrified gasps and squeaks. Dean entered slowly, Sam right behind him, not knowing what to do. The squeaks were obviously Cas, and he sounded like he was in a lot of pain, but Dean didn't know what was happening, who was in the apartment, or what their intentions were. 

 

He didn't want to surprise the intruder and get Cas killed. 

"Hello?" he called into the hallway. 

"Dean?" came the terrified squeak. 

"Yeah, Cas, I'm coming, don't worry." he said. he kept one hand on the wall, trying to steady himself as he headed towards the bathroom, "Don't be scared."

"No need to be, really." came a raspy voice and the bathroom door opened. Crowley stood in the doorway, looking like a cat who had a mouse between its paws. "Hello boys."

"What are you doing here?" Dean growled. Sam had his hand on his shoulder, reassuring. 

"I'm a vet. You havent contacted me with an update on my patient. I was worried." 

"So you broke in?"

"I'm a busy man. I couldnt leave and come back later for a check up."

"Dean!" Cas squeaked again and Dean pushed back the man in his black suit, heading to the bathtub. Cas's bandages had all been removed and there were dark red spots on his arms and tentacles, as if someone had grabbed him too hard. They would bruise soon. 

"Hey, Cas." Dean ran a finger along Cas's jaw and the fear in the creature's face faded away. He clung to Dean's hand, keeping him there. "You're okay. Everything's going to be fine."

"What did you do to him?" Sam asked, holding onto Crowley. He could see the marks on Cas from where he was standing. 

"I had to check for infection!" Crowley denied, "It's not like I told him to struggle."

But Cas was clinging too hard for that to be completely true and there was something about Crowley that made Dean uncomfortable. He wanted the man to get as far away from him as he could. 

"Get out." he growled, "Now. I will call the cops."

"That's fine." Crowley raised his hands, surrendering, "That's understandable. Just thought you might want to know, you got a phone call when you were away. Being the gentleman I am, I answered for you. Interesting that Naomi would call here."

Dean stilled. Cas stilled, staring up at him. Naomi had his phone number? She had found his work too. She must have known his address too. 

"Sam. Look after Cas." he stammered and then he was standing up, Cas raising up a bit as he clung to Dean's hand. He splashed back down into the water though and Dean was following their intruder out of the room. 

As soon as they were in the main room Dean was all business, grabbing the doctor by the lapels of his suit and dragging him close. 

"What did she tell you?" he spat into the shorter man's face. 

"She just wants to buy Cas off you. She wants him for her own. She'll give you anything you want."

"I already gave her my answer on that."

"I can give you more."

Dean stilled, anger just behind his skin. It throbbed in his clenched knuckles. It tingled in his spine. It blinded him. 

"Dean, think about it." Crowley removed his grip from his jacket, "Think. Cas is a member of a species the world doesn't know about. Naomi knows about them, but she's hiding them from the world. You can be part of a major scientific discovery! Everything you've ever wanted would be yours."

Dean thought about it. It made sense. Cas shouldnt be the only one in existance. He needed his own kind, to be back with them. Maybe if Dean helped Crowley out, Cas could get his own species back. 

"What would you do with him?" he asked. He didn't like the idea of Cas being put on display, being some sort of amusement for idiots. 

"Well, I'd have to take him to different scientific communities, show him off, get their opinions. They'll, of course, think it's some kind of freak of nature or something but tests will be done and I'm sure that they'll find he's not a fake or anything. Then there will be the biopsy, so we can learn eve-"

"BIOPSY?" Dean interrupted, the anger flaring through him once more. "You're asking me to kill him for your stupid discovery?"

"Well, it would be highly bene-"

"No. Not now, not ever. You get out of my apartment. You get out right now."

"Dean." Crowley grabbed his shoulder, hard, "You listen to me. You give me Cas, I do what I can to let the world know. You don't? Naomi will get her hands on him. I know her. He will be lost and there will be no benefit. Everything you've done will have been wasted."

He wasn't listening. He wasn't leaving. He was going to stay there in his cool black suit and his thick accent. He was going to keep trying to get Cas. And Dean only knew one way to get him to shut up and go. 

He swung. 

His fist collided with the veterinarians nose and and then they were both cursing. There was blood dripping down Crowley's face and he leaned forward, cupping it. Dean was shaking his hand, his knuckles bursting in pain. 

But he wasn't done. Hitting Crowley felt good, felt right, and he kicked him, right in the ribs. He was going to get him out of the apartment and it was going to be a message to everyone. You do not mess with Cas.

And there was a hand on his shoulder and Sam was shushing him and then his little brother was pushing a bleeding and winded Crowley out the door. 

Dean slumped. He hadn't been in a fight for a long time. He hadn't missed fighting. Sam pulled him onto the couch and rubbed his back as the tears streamed down his face.


	17. Until the sun comes up you can hold my hand

Sam stayed there that night. He ordered pizza and ate one and a half on his own. He slept in Dean's bed. 

 

Dean ate sparingly, only because Sam made him eat. He ate in the bathroom, tearing off pieces of his pizza for Cas to eat. Cas ate just as sparingly as Dean.

They were all silent, tense, waiting for something to happen. It didn't.

Dean kept scratching himself, nails deep in his thighs, but his jeans were thick enough to keep him from feeling it. Sam told him to stop. He did. He did not want to. Sam told him to sleep with Cas that night. 

He refilled the bathtub, making the water warmer. Cas seemed to relax a bit with the change in temperature. Just like always, Cas covered his eyes when Dean stripped, and he did not open them until Dean was underneath him in the tub, a washcloth over his groin and legs. 

Dean kept Cas on his chest. The little guy hadn't said a word since Crowley was kicked out. He was trembling. He was still scared. 

Dean ran his fingers down Cas's back. "It's okay." he whispered, "I'm not going to let anyone get to you. You're safe now. You'll always be safe."

Cas buried his face into Dean's face and said something but Dean couldn't make it out. He lifted Cas's chin, made them make eye contact, and asked him to repeat it. 

"Maybe it would be best if I did go." Cas shuddered, "They want me, these people, and I don't know what to do. I make it hard for you to be safe."

"Don't say that, Cas." Dean implored, running his hands through the small creature's hair, "It's not your fault. None of this is your fault."

"It is though!" Cas argued. "They want me. It has nothing to do with you. You should just let them take me. They're just going to keep trying."

"And I'm going to keep denying them. You're not going anywhere Cas."

Cas curled against him tighter. His tentacles did not move. He was keeping them completely straight, as if it hurt to move them. Dean touched them hesitantly and he did not complain or flinch. 

"Why would you even want me?" Cas sounded close to tears but both of them knew that he couldn't cry. 

"What?" Dean wrapped an arm around him and as he shifted those tentacles, Cas did flinch. "What are you talking about?" Cas, there's nothing about you that I don't love. There's no reason I would ever want you gone."

"You said I was adorable." Cas wasn't listening, "You said I was cute. I'm ugly now. This wounds are going to scar up and every time you look at them you'll remember bad things. You'll want me gone. I'm not even cute anymore."

Dean stilled. He stopped breathing for a moment. He didn't want to show Cas this. He didn't want Cas to ever know. But he had to. He felt like this was the only thing that would make things okay. 

"You think a couple of scars will make you ugly?" he asked, pulling away the washcloth that hid his legs. "Don't you wonder why I make you close your eyes when I change my clothes? Look."

He grabbed Cas, gently, and moved him down to see his thighs. They were a myriad of scars, thin white lines in perfect rows, one after another, half way from his groin to his knees. 

"What happened?" Cas speaked. His fingers were soft, light, as he touched the dull scar tissue. 

"I did." Dean admitted, "You know how I said you do more for me than you could ever know? This is what you do for me. I used to cut myself, take a knife to my legs. It would make the nightmares go away. It would make me feel like I had some ounce of control over my life."

He placed Cas back on his chest and now the creature was hoisting himself up on his elbows, looking up at Dean with big eyes. 

"But then I met you and I took you home and I made you better. You made me better too. You get rid of the nightmares, Cas. You make me feel so good about myself, about the world. You make me so terribly happy."

Cas was imploring, begging Dean to continue. Dean had the words just on the tip of his tongue. He couldn't spit them out. 

"I need you, Cas." was all he could manage, "And a couple of scars isn't going to make me need you any less."

Cas rubbed up against him. His shaking wasn't so bad anymore. He was a warm and wonderful weight on Dean's chest. 

"Thank you, Dean." he said but he sounded like he'd wanted to hear more. "I need you too."

And Dean closed his eyes, a hand running down his Cas's back.


	18. Little little seeds grew into troubled trees

Cas’s tentacles still weren’t moving. The red marks had faded to golds and purples and browns. He hadn’t moved, stayed on Dean’s chest all night. But he didn’t shift those tentacles, just laid them flat. 

Sam was gone, having left to go pick up breakfast, and Dean just lay there, stroking Cas with words in his mouth. 

"You okay?" he asked when Cas woke up. 

"Hurts." Cas admitted, "Crowley did something."

"Why didn’t you say something earlier?"

Cas buried his face against Dean, “Scared. So much was happening.”

Dean lifted Cas though, turned him around so that the still tentacles were closer to him. The tips quivered as he ran his fingers down them, tracing the blue that was becoming more dramatic against the black by the day. 

"Where does it hurt?" he asked.

Cas seemed embarrassed by the question. He was lying on his back now and he covered his face with his arm. “Inside.”

Dean thought about that. It didnt make much sense. There was no inside that he could get to. But there were the underside of the tentacles, where the four of them met, where his beak would be. Dean lifted the top two tentacles and shushed Cas as he gasped at the pain of it, laying them over Cas’s stomach so he could see inside. 

There was a small orange pin in there, pressed firmly into the soft flesh. Dean closed his fingers around it and Cas whimpered. 

"It looks like a tracker." Dean explained, "It’s only going to hurt for a minute."

"Are you pulling it out?"

"Yes Cas. And you’re going to feel so much better after, I promise."

Cas bit his lip, fingers scrabbling for purchase on Dean’s soft stomach. 

Dean pulled. 

The pin easily fell out and Cas was inhaling through his nose, trying to distract himself from the pain. There was one big drop of blood that followed the pin but nothing after and Cas’s breathing slowed, his grip loosening, and he became calm. 

"Thank you Dean." Cas patted his stomach, "Thank you."

Dean wasn’t done though. He had never seen this part of Cas before, had never explored his tiny body. He kept the tentacles open, amazed that he really wasn’t like an octopus at all. there was no beak or anything. 

He had a tiny little anus which was surrounded by tiny little suckers, the same kind that traveled down his tentacles. 

"You have a runt tentacle down here." Dean chuckled. There was a fifth one, right by the front two, but while the rest were almost five inches long, this one was less than an inch. 

Dean stroked the little tentacle and Cas gasped, head thrown back. 

"You okay?" Dean asked, worried. 

"Feels strange." Cas pushed himself so that the little numb was back against Dean’s fingers, "Good though."

Dean rubbed the little tentacle again, watching how Cas writhed at the contact. It was much more sensitive than the other tentacles and Dean experimented, giving light strokes then hard rubs, flicking his nail over the tip, where there was a little slit, and tickling the sides. He received a myriad of responses from Cas, tentacles wrapping around his hand to keep him there, gasps and moans, arching back and rolling eyes. 

Then the little tentacle opened up, the slit spread and the black skin folded away and a long pink member pressed out of it. It was maybe three inches, extremely narrow, and the color of Cas’s skin, all except for the tip, which matched his lips. 

"Oh shit!" Dean pulled away. "That’s. That’s a penis!"

Cas panicked as well, pulling away slightly. “I’m sorry! I didn’t know! Oh dear!”

Dean grabbed him though, held him down on his stomach. He breathed calming himself down. “It feels good though, right?” Dean asked. He could feel a heat in his own gut, could see his own penis getting hard behind Cas, “You want more?”

Cas looked scared, bewildered. He did nod though, just after a moment. 

Dean resumed rubbing and the sounds that Cas made were louder now, more high pitched. he thrust against Dean’s fingers, cried out his name. Dean was ridiculously hard, but he held Cas down with his spare hand, not touching himself. 

He wondered what Cas would look like when he came. He wondered how he would taste. 

"You’re so pretty like this Cas." he groaned, "I just want to eat you up."

"No!" Cas shook his head, humping against Dean, "Don’t eat me."

But Dean wanted to and he pulled Cas up, held him close to his face, and swallowed his thin erection. Cas groaned as he slid between Dean’s lips and the man ran his tongue along the strong muscle at the bottom of the creatures cock.

He changed positions so that He was on top of Cas, holding him close in his hands. He kept the gills on his hips submerged so he could breathe while Dean sucked and licked and swallowed. 

Cas’s hands were a mess of fists and clenched fingers. The fins on his back stretched and shifted. His head was thrown back, mouth open, eyes closed. 

He came, tasting of that smell you get in a fish stall. Dean swallowed him down before pulling off, looking down at the little creature in his hands. 

Only then did a disgust rise through him. What had he done? He had just sucked a cock, which he hadn’t done since an experiment in junior high! He had sucked the cock of his friend, his pet, and he didnt know where they were going to go from there. Would they both regret it? Would Cas hate him now? They weren’t even the same species. Was this beastiality?

"Thank you." Cas’s lids were heavy and he was soon to fall asleep in Dean’s hands, "Thank you. Does this mean you love me, Dean?"

"What?" Dean had feelings for Cas sure, but love? Well, he didn’t know. 

"Hmm." Cas was barely awake anymore, "I don’t know what love feels like. But you make me happy and I hate it when you arent there, and no one else is as good as you."

The fear of what had just happened faded away and Dean was left feeling relieved. That sounded as much like a confession of love as anything. And Dean didn’t know if he loved him back, but he did know he’d rather be with Cas than anyone else.


	19. I am sinking, merely sinking

Cas was healing, and he was growing. He was now over a foot in length and there was no way he could fit in his tank comfortably. Dean just kept him in the bathtub and changed the water every other day. It meant he didn't get to take a shower but he got used to baths and Cas didnt seem to have a problem with the cleaning products, although he did not approve of soap in his eyes. 

 

And well, the first touch wasn't the last. As Dean grew more comfortable being nude around Cas, Cas grew more curious about pleasuring him. He'd be showering and then there would be hands climbing up his legs, tentacles wrapping around them. Cas was still pretty small but Dean would kneel down and Cas would explore him. 

He would lick and suck at his cock, run his fingers and tentacles along it. He couldn't get it all in his mouth, he was too small for that, but he'd jerk him with a hand and a tentacle. He would swallow Dean's ejaculate with a smile. 

And Dean would explore Cas too. He wished that he was larger, wished that he could slide inside of him, make love properly. But he would grab Cas, pull his tentacles up and open and then he would lick at the tiny hole he'd found there. Cas was afraid at first, but when his tentacles coiled around him and the small opened to reveal his erection, Dean knew it was as sensitive as his own. 

Cas could penetrate him. His penis was small but it was still good. He would thrust as hard as he could into Dean, crying out at how good it felt, tell Dean how much he loved it, and then he would slide a tentacle in along his cock, fuck him with both at alternating speeds. That was when it became amazing, finally enough to fill Dean and make him quiver, hands scrabbling at porcelain. 

It was the best sex he'd ever had and while he felt a little bad, like he was using Cas, who couldnt really know what such an action inferred, he didnt care at the same time. Cas was smart and the way he curled around Dean, begged him to sleep in the tub almost every night, made him think that the creature did understand after all. 

But Cas was changing in ways other than just size. He was starting to pull himself out of the tub and wander around the bathroom. Before he would be gasping for breath, but now he could handle being out for a few minutes.

He could also read and was starting to figure out writing. 

He was asking questions about the world outside of the apartment. He was curious about his own kind and Dean had no answers for him. He found that there was no information on the Discovery Channel and Sam couldnt find anything online about them either. 

He was an anomaly.

While he seemed happier with Dean around and with his wounds turning to scars, Dean could tell that he wasnt always so joyous. It was when Dean left to go to bed,needing sleep in the comfort of something other than a bathtub, he could see a glimpse of overwhelming loneliness on Cas's face. 

It was there when he went to work too and he would have thought that it was because he was leaving if it weren't for the fact that he saw a shade of it whenever Cas thought he couldn't see.


	20. a treasure to touch

There was a knock on the door and Dean did his best to ignore it. He was lying down in the bathtub, one leg out the other on the rim, gasping with his head thrown back. There were two tentacles in his ass, lubed and rolling, pressing against his taut muscles and wriggling deeper. The suckers rubbed against his prostate, leaving him bucking. 

Cas’s other two tentacles were wrapped around his cock, one tight, one loose, and he bucked into them frantically, hands fisting around Cas’s own narrow prick. He fucked and gasped and whined, feeling his pet all over and inside of him. 

And when there was a second knock on the door he whimpered. 

"They probably heard you." Cas pulled his tentacles away from Dean’s red and leaking cock. "You should answer it."

Dean grabbed the back tentacles before they could pull out, “Please. Let’s ignore it. Just keep going.”

"They’re not going to leave." Cas kissed his abdomen lightly and pulled away. 

Dean didnt want to. He threw an arm over his eyes and made pitiful sounds. 

"You get the door or I will." Cas threatened and yes, okay, he was moving. He didnt want Cas to get the door. People would freak. 

So he tied a towel around his waist and hoped it was enough to hide his erection before making his way to the door. He looked through the peephole and saw two people. Jehovah’s Witnesses, he thought of them at first, but one was female and they didnt like their women wearing suits or going on missions. 

He opened the door. 

"Hey, you came at a really bad time, would it be alright if you-"

The woman pushed the door open, walking in. She looked around, not impressed at all, before crossing her arms. She was stern and angry and it took away from her beauty. The man who had come with her, thin and gaunt and dark, hurried to her side. 

"Where is it?" she growled.

Dean closed the door and leaned against it. “Where’s what?”

"You know what I mean!"

"The creature. " the dark man said. He was quiet and meek, obviously controlled by the blond at his side. "Naomi sent us to collect it."

"Well I told her she can’t have him." Dean crossed his arms. "I haven’t changed my mind."

"Do you have any idea what this thing is that you’re dealing with?" the blond was more angry than she had any right to be.

"My friend. And it’s a he not an it or a thing."

"That thing is going to change and it’s going to change soon. You should give it to us now before it reaches maturity!"

Dean didnt have to deal with this. He was tired of these people finding his home and entering it without invitation. He just wanted life to go back to normal. “I’m done talking to you people. Get out before I call the cops.”

The fire seemed to go out in the blonds eyes for a moment and she stood there, right in Dean’s way, inches away from him. She was daring him. He didnt respond well to dares. 

Regardless of his nudity he slid an arm between her legs and the other around her back. He lifted her easily, opened the door, and threw her out. He turned to the man, ready to give him the same sort of treatment. 

"Sorry about Hastur." he sheepishly smiled, "Bad day at the office. My name is Inias. Naomi would pay you handsomely for your friend, you know, and he would be with his own kind again. I understand that you don’t want to lose him though."

He dug through his pockets and finally handed Dean a simple white card. “Here’s our number. In a few weeks he should be fully mature. People like us, we can’t do what they need. You can call us though and we will collect him when you don’t know what to do anymore.”

Dean didn’t look at the card. “That’s not going to happen.”

The man put his hand on Dean’s shoulder. It was cool and calm, soothing in a way, “We’ll see soon enough.”

And then he walked off, closing the door behind him. 

Dean placed the card on the entryway table. He should have thrown it out, he wasn’t going to call them, but well, what if he didnt know what to do? From what he’d heard, maturing sounded like it was very complicated. 

He headed back to the bathroom. There was a splash just before he opened the door. So Cas had been listening in. 

"Hey." he said, entering.

"Hello Dean." Cas responded, a bit distant. 

Dean knelt beside him, resting a hand against the little guys jaw. “I’m not letting them take you, okay? No matter what.”

"What if you don’t know what to do? I don’t know what’s going to happen to me, if I’ll become violent or something."

"We’ll figure it out together." Dean promised. "I’m not going to give up on you."


	21. We got broken wings

The door was locked. Ever since those two suited henchmen of Naomi came by, Cas had locked the door. He wouldn't let Dean in. 

 

Dean would knock and then he would console and beg and threaten to take the door away and do whatever he could. He sometimes took over an hour before Cas would open the door for him. 

It had been over a week and Cas had started growing at a faster rate than before. He had been growing an inch in a week, now he was more than two feet long. When he did unlock the door he would jump in the tub and pull the curtain closed so Dean couldn't see him. 

He could get in there, see, talk, soothe Cas in the beginning, but with more time came more secrets. He was no longer invited into the tub or to spend the night. Cas wouldn't ask him questions or say much of anything. He mostly told Dean to leave him alone. 

And Dean did. He stayed away so Cas could have his privacy. He brought him food and left the plate on the floor by the tub so he could get it. He would sit outside, lean against the door and listen. He could hear Cas crying in there and the wails were almost like when he was hurt. Dean wanted to get in there, take care of him, but Cas wouldn't let him. 

So he sat on the sidelines and waited. 

He couldn't about ten days in. 

Cas's crying was worse and he wouldnt open the door, no matter how much Dean pleaded. He sounded like he was in agony. Dean was pounding on the door, teeth gritted, screaming to be let in. Nothing. Just more of Cas's sobs. 

So he did the only thing he could think of. He grabbed his power tools and took the door off at the hinges. 

"Don't come in!" Cas was screaming over his sobs but it was too late. Dean was in. 

He felt like he was going to be sick. 

There was something all over the place, it looked like bad scifi effects of brain tissue. Ribbons of blue, black, and tan organic material littered the floor and the counter and everything. 

The room smelled too, of rotting meat and blood. He covered his nose. 

"God Cas, what did you do?" 

"Don't look..." he sounded small, wounded. 

Dean pulled aside the curtain. 

Cas grabbed the material, tried to pull it back, but Dean's hold was too strong. 

He curled in on himself trying to cover as much of himself with his arms as he could. He couldn't cover much. 

The nasty organic stuff was all over him as well and it took Dean a moment to figure out that it was actually coming from the no longer so small creature. He was two and a half feet long and he was cradling himself, skin tearing off in wet strings. 

He was muttering under his breath, telling Dean not to look at him. 

Dean knelt though, ignoring the nastiness beneath his knees and reached out to touch Cas, calm him down a bit. Cas jumped at his approach though and turned, quickly. Dean didnt see his teeth as he bit him, drawing blood. 

Dean pulled away, hand bleeding and he held to his chest. 

"What the fuck Cas?" he instinctually growled. 

Cas just got smaller, "I'm sorry. I'm sorry."

He breathed. He had to be calm. One of them had to be. 

"Cas. You need to breathe. You need to tell me what's happening." he almost reached out again. 

"I don't know." Cas mumbled. This time Dean could see into his mouth. His gums were bloody and his teeth were sharp. He must have grown new teeth. No wonder he was hurting. "Can you make it stop?"

"I don't know how." Dean didn't lie, didnt put on airs of confidence. He had no idea what he was dealing with here. 

There was more though, more than just the skin sloughing off and the sharp teeth. Cas's skin had a sheen on it, underneath the exfoliated ribbons. It was mostly around his gills, that nasty ooze that coats new scabs when they're wet. 

"Are you going to get rid of me?" Cas asked, reaching out for Dean this time. Dean let him, didn't flinch away when Cas's hand wrapped into his shirt. "I know they said you can call them when you dont know what to do. Are you going to?"

"No." Dean shook his head. "Never. I swore we'd get through this together, didn't I?"

"You should." was all Cas said, but he didnt kick Dean out that night.


	22. I'm just a little rough around the edges of this life.

This was getting ridiculous and Dean was aching more and more each day. 

It had taken Cas more than four days for all of the old skin to rub off and he was left pink and tender, all fresh skin and new extremities. There were new fins on his arms and sides, more webbing, and his tentacles had grown narrow spikes in lines down their undersides. They were no longer black and blue, but a myriad of colors, all different shades of ocean colors, blue veins traveling over most of his body.

But that wasnt why Dean was sore. He was sore because after all of these changes, Cas didnt have to be in the water anymore. The gills on his shoulders had closed, only leaving the ones on his waist and he could breathe just as well out of water as he could in it.

This meant that any time he wanted sex, he could get to Dean and have it. While Dean was normally all in favor of this, Cas had grown a lot larger, not only in his body, but also in his penis. And he was always horny. 

As soon as Dean was home from work Cas was on him, pulling away his clothes, stretching him, and then thrusting hard inside. When Dean was too sore and couldnt take him anymore, he would fuck his mouth or hands. Nothing was enough. 

When Dean made it to the bathroom the toilet would be clogged. The water in the tub would be murky. It was clear that Cas had spent all of his time alone masturbating. 

Nothing was enough. 

The few hours Dean had for sleep weren’t enough and they were too light. He could always hear Cas crying while he was in the tub. He could tell that he was, again, masturbating, but he sounded so distraught about it, like nothing he did was enough. And it was true. He was terribly unsatisfiable. 

Dean wasn’t enough, although he tried to be,

He was trying though and he was with as as much as possible, but even then, he was surprised when he came home to an empty apartment and the phone off the hook.


	23. Can I call you if I'm back in town?

Cars were strange things and Cas had never been in one that wasnt being driven by Dean. He'd also had never been in one without being in a tizzy of fear and pain. And he hadnt been in one without a protective shield of water around him. 

 

They had helped him into a car seat though, buckled him in, the lean man had said that it was for his safety. It made him feel restrained. 

"Can I call Dean when we get there?" he asked. "I want him to know I'm alright."

"No." the blond woman growled and Cas curled his tentacles in and over himself. She scared him. She was too angry.

"Hastur..." the lean man winced. Cas liked him, just a bot. He was nice, even though he was in the shadow of the blond. He didnt seem strong enough to fight her though. 

"Well he can't." the woman looked out the window and the man looked down, a bit too sad as he took his eyes away from the other inhabitants of the car. 

He didn't look as he stroked Cas's hair. It felt different then when Dean did it. "Sorry." he whispered. 

Cas looked at the man. He was better than looking at Hastur. They drove in silence for a while and there was nothing he could do. He didnt mind the man touching him, just a nice soft pressure. It wasnt Dean, it didnt feel like Dean, but it reminded him of Dean. 

He missed Dean already. 

\-----

He missed Cas already.

He was completely drunk and he was sobbing into his phone. He'd never been a needy drunk before but now, now he couldn't do anything. 

He was in the bathtub, which no longer had water in it. It didnt matter. His legs were still wet though. They were wet and warm and he didnt care that his hands were trembling. They were wet and red and so was the phone in his hand.

He wasn't speaking, just making terrible sounds, and he wasnt listening either. Sam was on the other end and he was shouting and consoling but none of the words made sense. He wasnt supposed to talk on the phone while driving anyway. 

But he was heading over and he was trying to talk Dean down but there was no way, Dean wasnt listening. And there was so much blood.

Red everywhere.

The tub would never be clean again but that was okay. No one would ever sleep or love or live in it again either. 

Sam got there but he didnt hang up until he was inside the apartment. Dean had left the door open and Sam slammed it upon his arrival before he ran into the bathroom. 

He pulled away Dean's razor blades.

He pulled away Dean's hands.

He applied pressure to the lines and lines and lines in his thighs.

He told him that everything was going to be alright.

He held Dean until the bleeding stopped and then he kept holding until he stopped crying. He had to help him get to bed, after wrapping his thighs in gauze, he half carried Dean to his room. 

Sam stayed up that night, just watching Dean sleep.

And when the nightmares came, there was no little octopus to push them away.


	24. we can play husband and wife

The facility was much larger than Dean's apartment. It was larger than any building Cas had been in before. Hastur had wanted him to be restrained as they traveled through it, but Inias swore that it was unnecessary. He held Cas's hand and led him through the building.

 

Naomi was there and Cas finally saw the woman who had caused Dean so much pain. She was pretty, in a way, but there was something off about her that made her unlike what Cas knew feminine beauty to be. 

She smiled though and seemed relieved that he was there. She congratulated the humans. She didnt say anything to Cas. He could tell that she thought of him as lesser, as nothing more than an animal. 

She had a lot of paperwork to do and they kept going. 

They didnt pause again until they reached a pair of double doors. Hastur typed in a code and there was a large click, the doors unlocking. They opened them and Cas gasped at what he saw.

The room was nothing more than a giant pool. Inside of it was dozens of octopus people, just like him. They were all different colors and had different patterning, and they swam with a kind of joy that only came from swimming in your school. 

The females were easy to distinguish. Ignoring their breasts, he could tell by the fact that they had six tentacles instead of his four and their colors were muted and dull in comparison to the males. 

He was led into the water by the humans he was with and he was quick to let go of Inias' hand, to explore and meet with others of his kind. 

But just before he dived in he turned, looking up at the lean man. "What about my phone call?" 

"I'll look into it." Inias shuffled his feet, "No promises."

Cas nodded. He wanted to call Dean. He had to let him know that he was okay, that this wasn't his fault, that this was for the better. 

For now though, he could feel the insatiable need he'd had for the past week crawling through his system and now he knew what it was. He was mature now and it was time for him to mate. 

He headed for a group of females, ready to do what his species was made for.


	25. If I wait for you longer my affection is stronger

Sam helped Dean get dressed. He made him breakfast and watched him eat it. He stayed with Dean the whole morning, calling into the lumber yard for him to get the day off and the next day. 

 

Dean was a crying, dribbling mess. Sam checked the apartment, found no signs of a struggle. Still, Dean was acting as if his pet had been murdered in front of him. All signs pointed to him running away though. 

All except for one. 

Right by the phone, which had been left off the hook all night, was a business card. It had a name and phone number, as well as the name of a company. Inias was a strange name, but Sam was more interested in the company. Angelos Manufacturing. He'd never heard of it. 

When Dean took a nap, too exhausted to do anything else, he pulled out his laptop and started researching. He found pictures of the the building, but no information on what they actually manufactured. There was no address though. He found their website, a cheap, wordpress site that had been poorly slapped together. No contact information and no real information. It was all just vagueness. 

It must have been a fake company. If it was, that was a lot of work for a cover up. He studied the business card before searching for the name. Inias Moncrief. There was more information on him than there was on the company, but it was all old. He was a smart kid with a lot of potential. He was going to school for marine biology, worked at a mom and pop donut shop, stayed out of trouble. But then he vanished. There was nothing on the internet about him after 2008. 

That left him with one lead, the phone number. He called it, but got a message machine. So Inias was real, if the voice on the recorded message wasn't lying. He hung up instead of leaving a message.

He went to Dean's room, woke him up, told him what he'd found. Dean was a bit panicky, too quick to motion, and he was out of bed and heading to the phone before Dean knew what he was doing. 

He called the number though and this time, Inias did answer. 

"Where is he, you son of a bitch?" he growled into the receiver. 

"Oh, Dean." Inias was quiet, as per usual, "Good. I dont have your number. Castiel wanted to call you."

"Cas? What did you do with him?"

"Nothing. Dean, you have to understand. He called us. We did not steal him."

"I don't care. I want him back."

"I'm not permitted to give you any information. I'm sorry. I am so very sorry."

Inias hung up. Dean put the phone back on it's cradles before he slid down the wall, leaning against it. He held his head in his hands. 

"What did I do wrong?" his voice cracked. "What did I do to make him want to leave?"

\-----

Cas didn't understand. He was as good a swimmer as the other males, he was just as good looking, but as he approached the females they all darted and swam away. He chased them, trying to find a mate, knowing that this was his purpose. Maybe, if he found one, he wouldnt feel so empty anymore. 

But worse than that was the fact that he didnt know what they were saying. They were speaking another language, their own language, and he had never learned it. He had never been around his own kind. He could speak English and none of them seemed to have that capability.

He swam up to the surface, perched on the edge of the massive tank, and watched as the others swam by. He still didnt fit in. 

He wondered if Inias was working on his phone call, if he'd be able to talk to Dean. He missed him. 

He wanted to go home.


	26. You say you're alright

"Why the face, newbie?" asked a voice and Cas opened his eyes. Another of his species had swam up and had perched his elbows on the ledge to look up at him. He was smaller than Cas was, with bright gold eyes and dirty blonde hair. His tentacles were tan and gold, as were his fins. 

"You speak English." Cas looked him over. None of the others spoke English. 

"And french." the other smiled, "And Hindi. Gabriel."

Cas shook his hand. “Castiel.”

Gabriel pulled him up other the side of the tank so he could sit beside Cas. “So, what’s eating you?” 

"I… It’s nothing." Cas shook his head. He didnt want to talk about it. It was his problem, not Gabriel’s, 

"It is something. Tell me."

"I miss my Dean." Cas looked into the water. "He saved me from the lightning fish. I didn’t know what to do though, I started changing and it was hurting him, so I came here. None of the females want me though and I feel so strange, all the time."

"That’s natural." Gabriel instructed. "It’s mating season and you’re coming into maturity. You need to procreate in order to get rid of that feeling."

"But how?" Cas looked him over. He’d seen Gabriel before, in the tank. The females were highly interested in him. He was popular and had quite a few mates. 

"You’re too small." Gabriel explained, "They want a larger mate. And you smell. You have the scent of someone who’s already been mated."

"I’m bigger than you." Cas corrected.

"I’m a subspecies. An Arch variety. My size doesn’t matter. It’s kind of like I’m an alpha. You know what that is, right?"

Cas nodded. 

"You don’t know much about us, do you?" Gabriel asked. 

Cas shook his head. He had never met another of his species before. 

"Okay, here’s the laydown. We are a species called cincopeds. Unless you’re an arch, you mate for life. We have a pretty long lifespan, eat whatever we want, and if it weren’t for the fact that the lightning fish kick our asses, we would be an invasive species."

"Why are we worthless, though?" Cas asked. He had heard Dean talk about what Naomi had said. "Why don’t humans want us as pets?"

"We’re too smart." Gabriel shrugged. There was pain in him, Cas could tell. "People don’t like the feeling that they own something that’s smarter than them and we are a lot smarter than they are. We can learn a language in under a week, we can do complex calculations. We beat them every time. And that scares them."

"Dean wasn’t scared." Cas curled his tentacles up to his chest.

"You were." Gabriel realized. 

He pushed himself off of the edge and back into the water. 

"You can hang around me if you want, kiddo, see how we do this thing."

Cas smiled, slightly. Yes, he would like to see how his kind lived. He followed the arch, seeing the slight difference in their species. Gabriel had three pairs of wing-like fins on his back, while Cas only had the one, and he held himself back, trying not to swim too fast, so Cas could keep up. 

He still missed Dean, but it was good to have a friend.


	27. With no where to go

"Meg." Dean groaned into the phone.

"Hey Deeaan!" she excitedly chirped, "You change your mind?"

"No. I need to talk to Crowley."

He could practically hear her rolling her eyes, "He's with a patient."

"This is important."

"Isn't it always pretty boy?"

"Just put me through."

She huffed and then there was the terrible elevator music that told him he was on hold. Sam was sitting beside him, eating his third bowl of cereal of the morning. Dean was tired, unable to sleep through the nightmares. His legs hurt, ached, the healing tissue itchy. He wanted to open them up, remove the scabs. He wanted more of those terrible red lines.

"Winchester." came a gruff voice.

"Crowley."

"To what do I owe the pleasure?"

"I need to know where Naomi is."

"Ah, let me guess. You lost your little pet? For shame. You know, I know where her facility is, but it's hard to get in. I would have taken it apart years ago but the place is guarded, well."

"What's the address."

"You won't be able to get in."

"I don't care."

"Here's my proposition. I give you the address, you get me one of those creatures. I don't care if it's alive or dead, I just need to study it."

"Fine."

"And you bring Meg with you. I need to make sure you don't skimp."

"What?"

"You heard me."

Dean ran his hand down his face. He hadnt realized he was shaking, "Fine."

Crowley gave him the address and then hung up. Dean looked at his handwriting, his note of where the place was, and felt like shattering. 

Sam put a hand on his shoulder though, kept him together, and took the note from him. 

"So we have Meg too?" he checked. 

Dean nodded.

"Good."

That wasn't the response Dean was expecting. He stared up at Sam, surprised to see how serious he was.

"We could use a distraction." he thought aloud, "And a getaway driver."


	28. This Train is Crying to Meet You

Sam looked good in his suit. It was a little big on him, wasn't fitted, and was of an older style, but he looked good. He'd pulled his hair back into a ponytail and shaved, cleaned up his sideburns. He looked the part of a lawyer down to every little detail. 

 

Dean wasn't so lucky. He'd cut his cheek while shaving and had a piece of toilet paper adhered to his skin. He looked tired and he didn't stand straight. His suit wasn't old fashioned, it was old, and the last time he'd worn it was too his fathers funeral. It didn't fit anymore, too tight in the shoulders. He didnt fit. 

He let Sam lead the way into the facility. It was a large white building, a few miles out of town, and it was too clean. The Kansas dust should have made the exterior a mess, but it looked freshly power washed. 

The inside was just as nauseatingly clean. There was a large black desk, the only thing not white, with a young woman sitting behind it. Her name tag read Rachel. 

"My name is Mr. Young, I'm here on account of the Health and Wellness bureau." Sam dryly stated, flashing his ID so fast that Rachel couldn't tell it was just his school badge. "This is my partner, Mr. Crosby. We'd like a tour of your facility if that isn't too much to ask."

Rachel gaped, not sure how to respond. She looked from one to the other and then down at her books. She leafed through it, looking for them. 

"You don't have an appointment." she argued. 

Sam slammed his fist down onto the counter, but, other than that, kept his steely resolve. He was intimidating and large and terrifying and Rachel was gulping in response. "If we had an appointment it would have been easy for you to cover up something, wouldn't it?"

"Yes." Rachel stammered, "Yes, I guess so. I'll get someone to show you around. Just a moment please."

She got on her phone and Sam turned, breaking his facade to give Dean an all knowing 'I told you so' face. Rachel was talking to Naomi, that was obvious, and the woman was not happy with their arrival. She wanted them escorted out. She wanted them gone. Rachel argued with her though, reminded her that noncompliance would most likely result in them getting an even deeper investigation or worse.

She hung up and Rachel looked at the two men uneasily. "Someone will be with you shortly."

It wasn't shortly. It took a good twenty minutes for someone, a dark angry man named Raphael, to come meet them. They had expected that though. They had to cover up as much of their actual work as possible. 

He led them from one room to the next, not starting any conversation, just introducing them to the staff when they entered and explaining, curtly, what the purpose of the office was. Sam was good, really good, fitting into his role. He was on his hands and knees, looking at the wires of computers, the dust in corners, how the light switches worked. He inspected emergency exits and sprinkler systems, looked in the refrigerator.

Dean tried to copy his motions, look like he belonged there, but there was an itch in his thighs that he had to scratch, a worry in his mind, a need to go go go faster faster faster. He tried not to let it show.

It wasn't hard to figure out where Cas and the others of his kind were. There were two double doors, locked and kept far away, that they ignored the entire time. There was a number pad on it, and there was no way they were going to get the combination for that. 

"We're going to need to see inside there." Sam pointed the doors out with his pen. He'd been jotting down notes the entire time on his clipboard.

"There's nothing to see in there." Raphael promised, "Just maintenance. The whole area is under construction."

"Maintenance or construction?" Sam pressed.

"It's both. They're doing maintenance construction."

"Construction kicks up rats." Sam explained, "Cuts wires, damages the rest of the building. We need to see inside to make sure everything is up to par."

"None of us are allowed back there." Raphael retorted. 

Dean found his voice and it was an angry, menacing growl, "Don't lie to us. We know you're just a lackey, doing what the big boss man tells you. Cut the bullshit. We read up on the reports and the status of this facility before we came in. There has been no construction scheduled for this time."

Sam was staring at Dean, terrified that he was going to give them away. Raphael finally seemed impressed. 

"So you will unlock that door and show us around or we will be forced to give you negative marks and have this whole facility shut down. Do you understand me?"

"I understand you. Sir." Raphael had a hint of a smile on his lips.

"Good. Now I suggest you let us through."


	29. hope gets so high they're too hard to handle

Meg breathed through her nose. She was belted in. Her hands were on the steering wheel. Her foot was on the gas. The car was in drive. She was going.

 

45.

60.

80.

100.

She reached 120mph when she rammed her nasty old bug into the sign outside the facility. It said that it was Angelos Manufacturing and she thought it was garish. She stopped, faster than she had started, and her head flew forward. The belt almost snapped her clavicle before the airbag went out, deploying and catching her, pushing her back and away from the glass that had shattered all over her dashboard. 

She pulled herself out from the wreckage, wiping the hair from her eyes. There was a gun in her waistband and as people rushed out of the building to see the commotion she pulled it out, firing into the air. 

People were screaming and rushing about. Someone, somewhere in the chaos, pulled the fire alarm. 

Raphael looked back over his shoulder, holding the door open as a bunch of workers rushed past him. The alarm was loud and obnoxious. He started to close the door back up. He was distracted though and Sam slid his id in as it closed, keeping the lock from latching. 

"I should check that out." Raphael huffed. 

"We'll meet you out there." Dean waved. 

Raphael looked from one of them to the other. He didnt trust them. But the alarm had been pulled and there were protocols that they had to follow, especially with the officials were there. 

He ran off, in the direction of Meg and her little pistol. 

Sam pulled the door open. There were no more humans in the room. He swore under his breath.

Dean pushed past him. He wasn't quite so quiet as he swore. 

"Son of a bitch."

The room was full. It was one massive tank, full of little octopi things. There were so many, all swimming along with one another, none larger than four feet in length. There was no way they were going to find Cas. There were too many of them.

"What are you doing?" Sam hissed, but Dean was already climbing up the side of the tank. 

He stood on the edge of it, looking down into the water. A lot of them seemed to be in pairs. He hoped that Cas wouldn't be. He didnt want Cas to have a mate, now that he thought about it. It hurt his heart to think that Cas could want someone other than him. 

"Cas?" He called out. 

There was a splash way on the other side of the tank. He wondered if Cas had heard him. He called out again and this time, yes, a dark little head popped up. 

"Dean?" Cas called back. 

Dean was grinning and waving his arms, balancing precariously on the edge. 

"I've come to take you home!"  
A second head popped up beside Cas's and Dean's heart sank. His arms fell to his sides. 

So Cas had found someone after all.


	30. For i know you're all mine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Im still not up to full speed, but I'm pretending to feel better, so here's a thing

The little head popped back under the water and then it was rushing towards them, faster and sleeker than Dean had ever imagined. There hadn’t been much space in the bathtub for him to move around and now he was in a huge tank. The only thing Dean could see of him were the two fins on his back, breaking the surface of the water.   
At his side, seemingly holding back, was his friend. Dean hoped it was a friend, nothing more, but he wasn’t naïve. He knew that Cas had come here to mate. This was probably the girl he needed. He could see them the same way he could see Cas, via the fins making waves in the water. Unlike Cas, there were six of them instead of only two.   
Cas almost catapulted himself up out of the water, grabbing Dean and knocking him over off of his narrow foot hold. They fell together to the ground below, the wind knocked out of Dean by the impact, but even as he winced and tried to breathe he was happy. Cas’s hands were all over him, his face over Dean’s. He was apologizing for hurting him and peppering light kisses all along Dean’s skin.   
Dean recovered quickly, and so did Cas, pulling away from him and heading back to the tank. Dean was soaking wet as he pulled himself u, calling out to Cas and making him pause.   
“I came to rescue you.” He wheezed, “Why are you going back in there.”  
“I don’t need to be saved, Dean. This was my choice. I called them. You’ll find the money already in your bank account.”  
Cas’s friend reached down and took Cas’s hand, helping him back up and into the tank. Dean looked at the newcomer for the first time. They were male and for a moment that solved Dean’s nervousness about finding a mate. Cas did seem to prefer men though, so that probably didn’t mean much.   
“What did I do wrong?” the tears filled Dean’s eyes. What was wrong with him? Why did everyone want to leave eventually? “Why don’t you want to be with me?”  
Cas leaned over the side of the tank, looking Dean over. There was a terrible sadness over his features. “This has nothing to do with want, Dean. I came here because it’s what I was born to do, it’s my purpose. Nothing more.”  
“They’re going to feed you to the lightning fish.”  
“I know. It’s the natural order of things.”  
“Fuck that!” Sam growled, “We went through hell to get to you, Cas, we’re not leaving without you.”  
Dean pushed Sam aside, heading to the tank. He needed to touch and hold and feel Cas again. Needed something to make the scratching between his legs settle.   
“Cas. You’re smart, hell, you’re the smartest creature I’ve ever met. You know that this isn’t right. You know that this isn’t your destiny. You can make the choice yourself, what life should be.”  
“But I’m of no use to you Dean.” Cas inched away from his fingers. He did not want to be touched. Because if he was touched, he would never let it stop, “You’ve given up too much for me. I wanted to do something for you. Wanted to be useful.”  
Dean growled. He did not want to have to go through this again. He pulled down his slacks though, revealed the gauze and bandages, the scars, the intricate patterns of ruined flesh on his thighs.   
“Look at me, Cas.” He begged, “Look at what happens when you’re not there. See this? I can’t live without you. I need you.”  
“You need someone.” Cas corrected, “You don’t need me.”  
Dean touched him then, ignored how he tried t pull away. Rested a hand along his wet cheek.   
“I need you. I… I love you Cas.”  
Cas didn’t look at him though. He bit his lip and turned, looked to the smaller creature at his side as if for clarity.   
“Don’t be an idiot Castiel.” The other said, “It’s obvious you love him too. You should go with him.”  
This time, when Cas pushed himself out of the tank, he did not knock Dean over. He wrapped his tentacles around him, held onto him, arms around his shoulders and head in the crook of his neck. He was soaking and Dean’s suit was a mess, not that he cared. He had cold skin in his hands, dark hair against his lips. He had Cas back.   
“Please Cas?” he whispered into his hair, “Can we go home?”  
Cas looked once more at his friend, “What about Gabriel?”  
The other creature smiled awkwardly and shifted. He didn’t seem to have an answer either. “You know me. I’ll have all the ladies I want. Who cares when I go to the lightning fish?”  
Sam was the one who reached out his hand though, offered it up to Gabriel. “You want to come home with me?” he asked. “We can visit Cas whenever. You don’t have to die either.”  
Gabriel looked afraid. He looked back into the tank. He looked everywhere but at Sam.   
“I’ve had that offer before. Once I got too smart, Kali got scared. She sold me here.”  
“I’m not going to do that.” Sam promised, “Come on.”  
Gabriel was hesitant to reach out with a tentacle and then slide out of the tank, into Sam’s arms.


	31. do you want to lay them down?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> well, thats not what I expected, dont know about you

Meg was waving her gun, aiming it at one person and then another. Most of these people were scientists, accountants, they didn;t know how to react. Obviously someone had figured out what to do when a woman is yelling about animal rights and waving a gun after driving her car into the sign. There were sirens in the distance, quickly approaching. 

But she wasn’t the only person with a gun. 

Grimacing behind an antique glock was Raphael, aiming directly at Meg. He was yelling too, trying to get her to leave. Obviously he didn’t want to have to shoot her. Maybe he just didnt want to do the paperwork though. 

Naomi was the only one who turned when Dean pushed out of the front door, Cas’s tentacles wrapped around his waist so he could look over his shoulder. 

"Winchester." she sounded calm, calm like the ocean hiding electric eels and lion fish. "I knew this had something to do with you."

"We don’t want any trouble." Dean growled, trying to sneak past her and towards his own car, which was parked around the side of the building.

"Obviously you do." she cocked her head, looking at Cas. "Clearly you don’t know what you’re dealing with."

"Yeah, I do. He’s matured, it’s his time to mate, he’s ugly according to you." Dean mocked, he could feel Cas’s tentacles tighten around him. "Here’s something you just can’t seem to grasp. I dont care if it’s difficult, if he’s intelligent, I need him. And he needs me, whether you like it."

"You just don’t get it." she shook her head. "There’s more to it. See, at the height of their mating cycle, they get hungry. They need meat, and lots of it, more than you can supply. I mentioned that they’d be an invasive species if they weren’t fed to the lightning fish? Well, if they don’t have enough to eat, they will turn to living prey."

Cas’s arms tightened, fingers digging into Dean’s shoulders. 

"You didnt think those teeth were for aesthetics, did you? No, they will eat human flesh if you can’t keep them sated, and good luck with that."

"Dean." Cas muttered, burying his face into his neck and, thanks to what he was hearing, he really didn’t want those sharp teeth that close to his arteries. 

"We’ll do just fine." he clenched his jaw. 

And Sam came out, Gabriel half wrapped around one of his arms and then over his shoulder. 

"And this must be Sam Winchester." Naomi looked him over. "You’re larger than your reports say." Sam looked uncomfortable with the attention. Everyone was supposed to have scattered. This was supposed to be the easy part. "And you’re stealing a friend too."

Gabriel stuck his tongue out at her. She just rolled her eyes and turned to Raphael. 

"Shoot the girl." she ordered, "Then the big one. We can make it look like she’d killed him and then herself. Easy."

And Raphael fired. The bullet tore into Meg, making her spin as a cloud of blood sprayed from her. She was on the ground in seconds, unmoving, chest barely shifting.

Everyone else was in a tizzy, rushing about screaming. Naomi had let out a wild thing. And he was spinning, repositioning his aim. And firing again. Sam cried out as the bullet caught him, knocking it back. It loosened Gabriel’s hold, making him fall almost all the way off. Sam was still standing though.

Raphael smiled as he pulled the trigger again.


	32. we were bound to fall

"Sam!" Dean was screaming but he was too late.

 

Sam was on the ground. He wasn't moving. His chest was heaving. There was a terrible gurgling sound coming from his throat.

He wasn't moving other than that. 

Gabriel was faster than him, wrapping a tentacle around his shoulder and clenching, making a tourniquet out of his own body. He pressed another against the wound in his neck, deep in the side of it. The little guy was covered in blood already, but he hissed at Dean when he knelt to help. 

"They're still here, you idiot!" he glared. 

Dean hated to, he wanted to be down there with his brother, wanted to look out for him, but Gabriel was right. He got back to his feet and faced Raphael and the gun now aimed at him. 

"So, what now?" his voice was shaky.

"Now you know how serious we are." Naomi crossed her arms, "Are you more willing to negotiate now?"

Dean looked at Sam, at Gabriel still glaring. He turned to Cas, curled in his tentacles in terror at his side, gently touching his leg. He looked back at Naomi. 

He didn't know. Sam needed medical attention. He needed to be okay. That was all he could think about just then. Sam had to be okay. It was his job to keep him safe. 

He stepped forward.

There was a streak of black and the Impala slid to a halt in front of them. A scrawny, disheveled man in a suit leaned out, looking up at Dean. 

"Get in!" he ordered.

Dean cursed but reached down, grabbed Sam and Gabriel both, hoisted them up in his arms and crawled into the backseat. Cas got in on his own, almost purring at the intruder. 

"Inias!" he exclaimed. 

So this was Inias. Dean didn't feel so bad for leaving the keys in the Impala, just in case of emergency, now that he knew who was behind the wheel. And from Cas's tone, he was to be trusted. 

He jerked the steering wheel and spun the Impala around, driving them over to Meg, unconscious but barely breathing. 

Inias leaned out the window as Dean opened the door, pulling Meg in to share a seat with Sam. Gabriel latched onto her, applying pressure to the wound in her gut as well. 

"Naomi!" Inias shouted. "Let this be my letter of resignation!"

Raphael moved his aim and fired. 

Inias fell back with the momentum of the shot, falling out of the drivers seat and into the passengers. Cas was racing into the front seat, checking him, crying out his name. For once, Raphael had shot gold, his ancient gun listening to his aim. Inias had been shot in the temple, the exit wound a mess on the passenger side window. 

There was no chance of him surviving. 

He was already dead. 

"Drive!" Dean shouted. They had to go, had to get out of there. 

Cas barely glanced at him. He'd only been in a car a few times before, had no idea how to drive. But he'd seen car commercials and he was smart. 

He grabbed the steering wheel and slid down in the seat so that he could press at the pedals. He moved Inias's foot from the brake and they were off, too fast, too reckless. 

Dean didn't care. 

They were out of there, scraping against the gate and hitting the curb, Raphael firing after them, just as the police finally arrived.


	33. in this dark dark hour

They had pulled over. Dean had performed CPR. A cop had stopped them for speeding and then, seeing what was happening, called them an ambulance. 

 

Dean was exhausted, head in his hands. The hospital was cold. He couldn't sleep yet, not quite, sitting beside Sam. There should never be so many tubes and wires coming from Sam. There should never have been such a pale color to him. 

Dean couldn't stop staring at him, couldn't do anything but wait. He couldn't sleep until Sam woke up, until he knew that he was alright. 

He had paced throughout the surgery. He couldn't sit and read magazines. He couldn't do much of anything. All he had in him was worry. 

He ate what there was in the hospital cafeteria, but it was tasteless and he paid it no attention. It wasn't important.

Sam was. 

"Dean?" came a small voice from the doorway and Dean turned. It was late and there was hardly any foot traffic in the hospital now. 

"I told you to wait in the car." Dean reprimanded but Cas slinked in, head down, looking a bit too much like a beaten dog. 

"I was worried." he explained, climbing into Dean's lap, "And hungry. And tired."

Dean pet his hair absent mindedly. "Where's Gabriel?"

"In the vents somewhere. He thought it would be safer. Is Sam going to be alright?"

Dean looked at his pale brother, at his heaving chest. "Yeah, I... I think so. He's just lost a bit of blood is all."

"I'm sorry." Cas curled up against him. 

"Huh?"

"This is all my fault. I wanted to leave, I wanted you to be safe, to be happy. They paid you too, Two million dollars were put in your bank account. But I was selfish, to go. And you had to come get me. If it weren't for me, Sam would never have gotten hurt."

Dean grabbed him by the face, a hand on either cheek, fingers threading through his thick hair. He was almost ready for another haircut. "Don't say that, Cas." he whimpered, "Don't think like that. You're not to blame. It was Naomi, right? And that Raphael guy?"

Cas nodded against him. "Yes, Dean. Of course."

"We'll go home soon, okay?"

Cas nodded against him again and Dean released him, letting him curl back up against his chest. 

Dean turned, eyes wide as there was a banging through the vents. "Oh what now?"

"Must be Gabriel." Cas followed the sound. 

A tentacle slithered between the vents and wrapped around it, pushing and then the cover was falling, a small octopus-person peering out from the wall. He was filthy, covered in dust. 

"Finally." Gabriel grimaced, climbing out of the vent and falling to the counter below, "You wouldn't believe how many rooms I went through."

He didn't look at Dean or Cas, just headed to the bed, climbed up the side, leaving a trail of dust and dirt on the fabric. He inspected the tubes and wires but ultimately didn't care about them. He went right up to Sam instead. 

Dean almost jumped at him when he slapped Sam across the face, hard, with two of his tentacles. But Sam's eyes opened and he gasped, pulling at tubes and frantically looking around himself. 

"There we go!" Gabriel snarled and Sam calmed staring down at him. "What the hell were you thinking?"

"What?" Sam squeaked.

"You promised me!" Gabriel was close to him, spitting with each word as his anger boiled his blood, "You promised me you weren't going to leave me!" 

"I didn't."

"You were going to."

Sam slumped back and Dean was staring all over again. 

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to get shot."

"Don't try to weasel out of your promise again, alright?" Gabriel teased and he was smiling now. 

"Alright." Sam promised.


	34. I think that I've travelled enough

"WHAT THE HELL DID YOU DO?" 

 

Dean took the phone from his ear. It had been ringing for hours, but he'd only now picked up, only now that he'd gotten home and had fed the two starving creatures in his care. Naomi was right, their appetites were growing.

"It's all over the news! These little guys have been seen by the world! You completely ruined my chance at being a scientific marvel! You had one job, Winchester. ONE! And you completely ruined it."

"I don't know." Dean smiled, putting the phone back to his ear, "I did everything I intended. You got screwed over? Too bad, so sad, I don't give a damn."

"I should destroy you. I can you know."

"Oh I'm so scared! A veterinarian has it out for me. What are you going to do, shove a thermometer up my ass?"

Crowley went silent at that. Dean wondered if he was pouting on the other end of the line. 

"Hey, you should be glad. Your assistant got shot up pretty bad out there. I could have just left her to die."

"Where is she now?" Dean thought there might be a hint of softness under that pompous anger.

"Hospital. The doctors say she'll be fine, but it will take a while. She may have some digestive problems from now on though."

"I can still make your life a living hell."

Dean's smile spread as he looked over at Cas, who was sitting on the edge of the counter, taking his time with a plate of crackers and cheese. 

"Here, let's make a deal.Ten thousand dollars. Is that enough to keep you off my back?"

"You're joking, right?" Crowley was growling again. "That's pennies compared to what I would have had if you'd followed through."

"Yeah, well it's all I'm giving you."

Silence. 

"Fine." Crowley finally sighed and then hung up. 

Dean replaced the receiver an sighed. Thank god Cas had sold himself for two million, Dean wouldn't have had any leverage otherwise. 

Then again they wouldn't have had any of these problems either. 

"Bedtime?" Cas asked. The lines under his eyes were darker than usual. He was exhausted from everything that had happened. 

Dean lifted him up and he curled himself around Dean's shoulder and arm, head resting in the crook of his neck. Gabriel was already asleep in the bathtub, so Dean took Cas to his own bed that night. He stripped down to his boxers, Cas big eyed, never allowed to see Dean strip so much before. 

But Dean no longer had anything to hide and he slipped under the covers, holding them up for Cas to follow suit. Finally, they were able to sleep together comfortably and Dean was glad to have strong tentacles wrapped around him.


	35. I've been wishing on a star but I never could have imagined

Kisses. Small, tiny little pecks. They were grazing his flesh, his scar tissue, his bandages. 

He woke up. All he could see of Cas was a stray tentacle poking out from under the blankets and a large mass around his thighs. He chuckled and lifted the covers, distracting Cas from his morning surprise. When he saw what Cas was doing though, the smile fell from his lips. 

Cas was gingerly and carefully kissing every wound he had dealt his body. He was being explicit and in depth, not missing a single one. His eyes were lined with red, as was his nose, and he was snuffling as if he were crying. He couldn’t cry though, and his face was completely dry. 

Dean wrapped his arms around Cas and pulled him up and onto his chest. “Hey now, hey. No need for that.”

"It’s my fault." Cas whimpered, "If I hadn’t left…"

"You were kissing old ones too." Dean reminded, "And hey, now that you’re here, they’re not going to happen again, alright? I promise. As long as we’re together, no matter how bad it gets. You’re my anchor."

And Cas kissed him. His teeth were sharp but, even though the kiss was rough and hard, he was careful not to cut Dean. His tentacles were wrapping around him, holding him tightly, needing him. 

"I noticed something else while I was down there too." Cas smiled when he finally pulled away, "May I?"

"Anything you want, babe."

Cas squirmed back down, off of Dean’s chest and back onto his legs. The touches Dean had woken up to had already gotten his cock hard and now Cas was large enough to take all of it into his mouth. Four feet long and Dean thought he may still be growing. 

He licked it first, got the entire member wet, and then he swallowed it down. His tentacles massaged Dean’s thighs as he bobbed up and down on Dean’s cock, eliciting high whines from the human’s lips.

The tentacles moved down as Cas pulled off, needing to breathe, but licking and kissing and entering the slit of his cock with his tongue. The tentacles massaged his ass cheeks, pulling them apart and exposing his hole. 

"Missed you." Cas promised before swallowing him down again.

"Oh God!" Dean gasped as one tentacle slid deftly into his hole. It wriggled and writhed inside of him, opening him easily, Cas flexing muscles to make it change in size, grow larger, stretch him further. 

"Please, Cas?" Dean thrust up into the creature’s mouth, slicing his skin on one of those narrow teeth. 

Cas pulled off, licking away the blood. “Of course, Dean.” he jerked himself, that small fifth tentacle, until it folded open and his long narrow cock came free. It was longer now, proportionate, and Dean knew it would be far too deep inside of him. He could take it though. He’d seen others, amateur pornographers with dildos the width of his fist sliding up past their belly buttons. 

He could take it. 

Cas was leaking, a thin clear lubricant spilling over his erection. That was new, something to do with maturity, perhaps. Regardless, Dean was glad for it. 

Cas slid in slow, keeping an eye on Dean as he inched into him. He only went about half as deep as he could before Dean was gasping, eyes clenched. He stayed there, let Dean adjust, and then he was going, thrusting, hips moving quickly, light airy moans leaving him. 

He never pushed deeper, just stayed there, sliding almost all of the way out before reaching that half way point. 

Dean was writhing, never feeling this before. It was so good, so much, so deep inside of him. He wondered if, if Cas kept growing, his cock would get so long that Dean would choke on it. 

"Deeper." he pushed, knotting his fingers in the sheets. "Please, Cas, I can take it."

Cas thrust harder, slipping in another few inches and drawing out a low rumbling groan from Dean. With each thrust he now went a little bit deeper, a little bit closer to all of the way. 

He licked up Dean’s cock again, but at the angle he was at, licking was all he could do. That and hold it, stroke his cock with hands and tentacles, keeping Dean guessing at which angle the sensation would come from next. 

Dean came when Cas bottomed out, his cock sliding all of the way inside of him. It was with a muffled sob and white lights in his eyes that he came, ejaculate jumping from his cock and landing in thick puddles on his stomach. 

Cas ran his tentacles through the white liquid as he continued to thrust, faster, losing rhythm, getting close. He licked the tentacles clean and it was so dirty, so deliciously obscene that Dean was already starting to get hard again. 

Cas came with a shrill squeak and then collapsed on top of Dean’s leg, still buried inside of him. He was panting, exhausted. Dean grabbed him, pulled him out of his come slick hole, laid him out on his chest. They just breathed for a moment, holding each other, fingers lightly tracing shapes into one anothers skin. 

Then there was a knock at the door. 

"Are you guys done in there?" Gabriel called out.

Dean’s face turned red. He had forgotten that they had a guest. Poor guy must have heard everything. 

Dean grabbed a blanket, covered them both in it. 

"Yeah, sorry!"

The door opened and Gabriel stood there, pouting, arms crossed over his chest. “There was a policeman at the door. He was looking for you. I didn’t answer it but he said he’d be back. Left you his card.”

The cops? Shit. Dean ran a hand over his face. Of course, he had two wounded and one dead in his car, why not the police?


	36. But in our town there's just one stoplight

The knock on the door came at around noon. Dean was satiated, of sex as well as food. He had thought that the lust had worn off when Cas was away, but it hadn't. Cas was just as horny as before, if not more. Gabriel was too, although he was better at taking care of it on his own, jerking off into the toilet while the others fucked in the room across the hall.

 

Dean opened the door though to see a scrawny looking guy in a police uniform, jotting notes in his notebook. He smiled when he saw Dean though, extended his hand. 

Dean shook it. 

"Officer Fitzgerald." he introduced. "I'm glad I finally caught you! I'm here to talk to you about the two wounded and one dead you were found with in your car. You have a minute?"

"Of course." Dean faked a smile.

"Can I come in?"

"I don't think that's necessary."

"Oh. Alright. Uh, so you want to tell me what the hell..." he trailed off, staring past Dean. 

Dean turned, seeing Cas looking around the corner. 

"Cas. You know not to let anyone see you!"

"Sorry." Cas got small. "But I'm hungry."

"We just ate."

"I know..."

"Is that?" the officer sputtered and then a smile spread over his face, even bigger than before. "I saw you one the news!"

Dean was staring at him. "What?" 

"It's everywhere! The animal rights activists that revealed a whole new species! Everyone knows now! They didnt say who the activists were though!"

Dean smiled. This guy didnt need to know the truth. 

He went to his knees, getting close to Cas's level. Cas was slow and tentative, but he approached the officer, who held out a hand to shake one of the tentacles. 

"You're hungry, huh?"

Cas nodded, "Naomi said I was going to be really hungry, uncontrollably so. I don't know what to do."

"You know, my Aunt Bertha had a problem like that, got her stomach stapled. Uh, not that I'm suggesting that." he glanced up at Dean, "But noodle soup, plenty of water, lean meats, and rice should help you out."

Dean smiled at him, "You sure?"

"Yeah! It's filling but not fattening."

The officer stood back up. "I guess I'll just uh, make up the report, huh? I mean, we all thought the officer who helped you out was nuts. I doubt I'll get any further."

Dean couldn't stop from grinning, resting a hand on the scrawny guys shoulder. "You know... you don't suck."

The guy really did look pathetic as he looked away from him, "That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me."

"I owe you a beer." Dean offered, "Hit me up sometime."

"Will do." he saluted and headed out of the apartment.


	37. I can give you what you're after

Work. Dean had almost forgotten about his day job with everything that had been happening. Cas had let him sleep, but it had only been for about two hours. He was ridiculous, always hard, even after an orgasm his narrow cock would still be needy for more. Dean pitied whoever his intended mate would be. Hell, he pitied himself with his sore ass and cracked lips. 

He came in a bit late, reeking of sex and chewing on his breakfast still. Alastair smiled at him when he came in though, smacked his still aching ass. The guy creeped Dean out and, when he did anything sexual like that, it was three fold. 

But Dean had a favor to ask, so he let the guy do it. 

"Can I work on the lathe today?" he asked around the last of his toast. 

"Not feeling it out there huh?" Alastair sneered.

"Just not today." Dean shrugged, "Can I get some practice at least?"

He rarely got to work on the lathe. It wasn’t his expertise, a bit too artsy and delicate. But he knew what he wanted to make today. He had a goal. That always steadied his hands, made him better at the small things.

"Two hours." Alastair promised, "Then back out on the lot. We’ve got a couple orders to fill."

"Yes sir." Alastair’s smile spread. He liked being called sir a bit too much. 

Dean got to work though. The lathe was luckily in it’s own room and he was able to work alone. He did not want to be interrupted while working. He didn’t know how to explain what he was making anyway.

So he got to work with scrap wood, carving and whittling it into different sizes and shapes. He hoped Cas, and Gabriel too, would like what he was making for them. 

It was a series of dildos, going from what Dean knew they could take to the heft and size of his own cock. He was afraid to go any larger than that. 

He also made some sleeves, basing his design off of fleshlights. He would have to line and fill them with silicone on his own, but at least he was getting the base done.

"So, planning a party?" Alastair leered, picking up one of the phalluses. 

"It’s for a friend." Dean turned red. 

"Right… a friend. Dean, if you ever need anything, I am always here for you."

"Thanks but no thanks." Dean bared his teeth, curling in on himself. He wanted Alastair miles away from him.

Alastair cupped his jaw in one hand though, sweeping his cheek softly with his thumb, “God, the sounds I could force you to make. I’d love to see you on my rack, Dean, all bare muscle. I could make you feel things you’ve never felt before.”

Dean waved him off, pulling away from his touch, “That’s sexual harassment sir.” he tried to shake it off.

Alastair just started to sing a show tune in his airy, cracking voice as he moved back to the sales floor.

Dean waxed the toys he had made, got them shining and deep in color, and then headed out to the lot. He had to get as far away from Alastair as he could. 

He distracted himself with thoughts of the little guys’ reactions to his gifts for the rest of the day.

——

Cas was surprised and confused. Gabriel was ecstatic. 

Dean knelt down, explained to Cas the purpose of the toys, told him that now he could take care of himself all night and when Dean was at work. 

The explanation got him a big smile and a bigger hug and that soothed out the last nerves Dean had from Alastair’s remarks. 

He took Cas to his bedroom and showed him how to work his new toys until it was time for him to go to bed


	38. For i know you're all mine

Dean had a very good rule, at least he thought it was a good one. No toys outside the bedroom and bathroom.

 

That didn't mean that there weren't toys in the kitchen, spots and stains of the octo-equivalent of semen on his cabinets and floors and counters and everywhere. It was disgusting, unhygienic.He made sure it was perfectly clean before he went to work, but by the time he got back it was always a mess again. 

And he couldn't have that, not since Sam was coming home that evening. 

So he picked Cas up, even though he had a sandwich in his mouth and a toy in his hole, one of the biggest and moved him to the bedroom. The room was even worse, but Sam wouldn't be seeing that. 

Cas whined though when Dean set him down, fingers tight in his shirt. 

"Am I in trouble?" he asked, worried. Gabriel had been telling him about his own experiences and the idea of time outs had gotten into Cas's head.

"No." Dean pet his head, "But I'm trying to clean and you two keep getting it dirty again. Sam's coming home tonight. There's no way it's going to be clean in time as it is."

"Can I help?" Cas didnt release him.   
"Would you? Or would you just keep screwing yourself on every surface?"

Cas looked down himself, a blush spreading down his chest. "I can control myself." he promised, quietly.

"Hey." Dean took his chin in hand, lifting his face so they could make eye contact. "You get Gabriel to help and we get it down with an hour until Sam's due here, I'll fuck you properly, alright?"

Cas's eyes were huge, face contorted into ecstatic vigor and he raced to the bathroom to get Gabriel.

Real sex. They hadn't gone there yet. Dean had always been too scared to actually put his penis in Cas. He'd always been too small before and Dean didnt want to hurt him. But he'd been working his way through those toys, going bigger and bigger. With enough lube he could take the biggest, and he didnt even have to touch himself to come when he was so full.   
With the two little ones help, the place was clean in under two hours. Gabriel was a bit afraid of the vacuum, although he couldn't explain why, but they wiped down all the surfaces that they could reach, suctioning onto things to get further. They washed the dishes, even if they climbed into the soapy water when they did, and Dean dried. They even fuffed the pillows on the couch.

Dean had found out that Gabriel had a big weakness to sweets, so he got one of the big rainbow lollipops as a reward for helping. Cas got to climb into Dean's arms and be taken to bed though. 

Cas's hole was puffy and red in all the dark coloration, gaping already. It pulsed when Dean spread his tentacles out revealing it. 

"Are you sure?" Cas asked and then he was whining, hands knotting the sheets as Dean bent down, licking the sensitive gap in his body. 

"As long as you tell me if it's too much."

He tongued the hole, lapping up the wetness that Cas was already dripping. He fucked him on the muscle, inching it in and then pulling it almost all of the way out. 

He licked from the hole all the way down Cas's tentacles, sucking on the tips of each one while he poured the lube onto his fingers. 

"Don't want to wait." Cas muttered but his tentacles relaxed against the sheets when Dean's index pressed against him. 

Dean breathed with him as he slid the first digit in and he felt Cas tense around him. He wriggled inside of him, feeling those ridges inside of his body. Cas responded by pushing back, forcing Dean in more. 

With a smile he started to thrust, making Cas squeak. 

"All this just from one finger?" he teased, his middle finger circling the first, "And you think you can take my cock?"

"Please!" Cas begged and he pushed, whimpering as his hole stretched around Dean's second finger. He filled himself with them and, wow, if that wasn't hot, Dean didn't know what was. 

He crooked his fingers, pressing against whatever counted as Cas's prostate and the little guy was moaning, writhing, fighting to get more and less at the same time. Dean held him down, a hand on his back, as he scissoring him open, taking him apart so easily. 

He took his hand away from Cas's back, stroked and pulled out his engorged cock. "You want more?" he asked, pouring lube onto himself and spreading it to coat all of him. "Want to feel all of me inside of you?"

"Dean." Cas gasped, "Want you. I want to feel you come in me." 

Dean paused then. He hadn't even thought about that part. There was no reason he couldn't. Cas was male, he couldn't get him pregnant, right? And they weren't the same species anyway. It wasn't possible. 

He took his fingers out though. Everything was going to be fine. He pressed the head of his cock against Cas's hole. It hadn't seemed so small before. He didn't know if he could do this. 

"Breathe." he ordered, fingers still slick running down his back to calm him. His heart beat was too fast for Dean's liking. Cas did though and it was on an exhale that Dean pushed inside, making the little guy gasp and shake and cling to whatever he could grab. 

Dean halted, shushing him and trying make him feel better. He knew this was a bad idea. "You okay? Oh man, I'm so sorry. So so sorry." but he couldn't pull out. Cas was clenching down on him with those muscles and his tentacles flared out, wrapping around his dick and forcing him to stay still. 

"Just..." he closed his eyes, burying his face in Dean's pillow, their pillow, "Just give me a minute."

Dean gave him a minute. He was willing to give him an hour if necessary. But Cas just lay there and breathed and slowly, very very slowly, his muscles relaxed. It was when he nodded that Dean moved again, agonizingly slowly, but Cas only hissed once at the intrusion. 

Dean finally bottomed and then, there, he stayed inside, not moving. He wrapped his arms around Cas, slowly pulling him up so he was on top. 

"How does it feel?" he asked. 

"So big." Cas's voice was strained, tight, "I feel so full, Dean. You feel so good, so hot."

"Good, good." He traveled his fingers up Cas's sides. He wished he'd had Cas facing him, he wished he could see his face. "Take your time. Move when you want."

But Cas wanted to move right then and, with his hands on Dean's gut, he started moving, pushing himself up and down, moaning and crying out and pinching at his skin as he slammed down on Dean's member over and over again. 

"Oh God!" he was crying out, "Oh God Dean! Ah! So good! Don't want. Don't want this to stop! Want you to come in me! Mark me! Make me yours!"

He shouldnt have been saying such things. It was driving Dean wild and he was so tight, almost a vice on him. He felt so good and flush and hot, so safe inside. Dean was gasping and groaning right along with him, fighting the urge to thrust up. 

"Don't want anyone else. Don't want toys. Don't want anything to touch me but you."

Dean's fingers were tight on Cas's hips, making him go faster, harder, and Cas was sobbing from the friction. 

"Don't! Don't do that!"

Dean slowed down, but didn't stop, "Does it hurt?"

Cas shook his head. "Don't want to come yet. Want you in me forever."

Dean slammed in then, making Cas scream out, "Perfect. I want you to come, want you to be happy. And I'll be in you again, I promise. Whenever I can I'll take you, just like this."

Cas's head fell back, mouth gaping and as a white spurt of liquid burst from him, Dean once again cursed how he couldn't see his face.

But all of those muscles were tightening and, he'd never seen white during an orgasm before. Cas cried out again as his hole was filled further, this time with Dean's spunk. 

Cas pulled off immediately after Dean stopped pulsing in his body, falling forward onto the sheets. Dean moved, curled around him and held his hand as best as possible. He could see his ejaculate leak out of Cas's exhausted hole and he smiled, cleaning the sensitive area with his fingers.

Cas took his fingers lazily with his tentacles and licked them clean. "Thank you."

Dean kissed his temple. "Cas, you're my angel, you know that? I'd do anything for you."

Cas pressed against him, big blue eyes shrouded with sleep as he looked up at him. "I know. I love you too."

And he fell asleep, just like that, pressed against Dean.


	39. And this train is dying to meet you

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the end

"Are you drunk?" Dean asked, looking over the officer at his side. 

"I had, like, a whole beer." Garth smiled, words slurring at the edges. "Of course I'm drunk."

 

Dean rolled his eyes but turned back to Sam, who was just having water and juice. He wasn't allowed to have alcohol yet and moving around was still a bit difficult. He was stiff, but Dean had decided that they should spend his first night out of the hospital celebrating. 

"How ya doing, Sammy?" he asked, a hand on his brother's shoulder.

"I'm fine." Sam faked a grin. He wasn't fine. There was a torrent of thoughts in his head and there was nothing he could do to stop it. 

"Don't kid a kidder." 

Sam sighed, looking away from Dean and drinking his juice through a straw. There was no manly way to drink from a straw, but Sam didn't care. 

"I've got hospital bills." he sighed, "And student debt. And no job."

"So?"

"So? Dean, that means I have no money! I can't afford an apartment or food or anything."

Dean took another drink from his beer, reaching out a hand to stop Garth from getting up and joining in the karaoke that wasnt even scheduled for that night. 

"Stay with us." he mumbled.

"What?" Sam stared at him, "Dean, I'm not a little kid anymore. I may be hurting but I don't need to be carried anymore. You can't afford me and those two critters."

"One, Gabriel is your responsibility, you're paying for him." Dean informed, watching how Sam bit his lip with the weight of more responsibility. "Two, when Cas sold himself to that place, he wasn't cheap. I've got just almost 2 million dollars in the bank. I think I can handle you getting on your feet."

"You'd do that?" Sam looked him up and down.

"Well, you'd have to babysit while I'm at work, but yeah."

"Thanks Dean."

 

It was a good thing that Sam hadn't been drinking. He ended up having to drive both Garth and Dean home, had to half carry his brother into the apartment.

He smiled upon entering. It was cleaner than he'd ever seen it. Looked like the little guys had been helping out. 

Dean's bedroom door opened and Cas stumbled out, eyes bleary from sleep. 

"Dean?" he mumbled before looking up. 

"Oh, hey Cas." Sam greeted, "Mind moving? I think Dean needs to go to bed."

Cas obeyed and watched as Sam put him to bed, tucking him in like a worried parent. "Is he okay?"

"Yeah." Sam promised, "He won't be in the morning though. He just had too much to drink, nothing to worry about."

Dean mumbled something and turned onto his side. 

The bathroom door opened and Gabriel joined them in the hallway.

"Sam!" he exclaimed and raced to his side. Sam gathered him up and his tentacles wrapped around Sam's arms as he leaned forward to rest his face against Sam's own. 

"See? I told you I wouldn't leave you."

"You better not have." Gabriel chirped.

"In fact, Dean said I could stay here for a while. So it looks like you won't be leaving Cas either."

Gabriel grinned at that. 

Yes, staying here would be fine. For here was family. It may have been really messed up and two of them may have been screwing each other and keeping it as much of a secret as possible, but it was a family. And Sam was glad to have been invited into it.


End file.
